Reality Bites
by sissybear
Summary: When Jack gets left behind, what he finds may force him to make some decisions that may change his life forever COMPLETE!
1. What the!

_**Disclaimer:** Okay i don't own them, (i am pout) and i know who really does. i in no way would ever try to get any money out of this!_

_A/N: Okay i decided to rewrite this series into one story, and just seperate it by making the little stories into chapters so here goes, hope you like!_

**Ch.1**

**WHAT THE?**

Yet again, here I was waking up from being knocked unconscious on some God forsaken plant. P3- whatever so have you.

Grumbling, I sat up slowly. My head was pounding like a jackhammer. I ran my hands carefully over my scalp, checking for injuries. Hm, no blood, must be a good sign. I didn't seem to have any other injuries, so I stood looking around.

Well, gee guys, whatever happened to leaving no man behind? No one was around, anywhere. I figured my best course of action would be to get back to the 'Gate and get home.

Easier said than done. I started getting Iraqi flashbacks; not good when it's over 100 degrees in the shade.

Nothing really looked right. I couldn't place my finger on it, but the growing anxiousness in my gut told me I had to get out of there and fast!

I hit the DHD as fast as I could, but the 'Gate seemed sluggish today. The chevrons locking in so slowly it seemed time stood still. God, I hope this isn't another one of those Damn blackhole planets. I could feel a cold sweat break out over my body.

The trees! The Damn things were stalking me, I swear it! But that was the clincher. They weren't the same trees. Trees were the first thing I ever noticed when Gating onto a new planet. I mean they were the same trees as when we first arrived on the planet, but they just looked different, like they had shifted a foot to one side. I shook my head and stepped throught he event horizon.

Stumbling out of the 'Gate, a wave, no Tsunami of relief washed over me as I felt the steel grating of the ramp under my feet. Oh, God! was it grerat to be back. "Close the Iris!"

Then, that sound. The one that makes your heart drop down straight to your balls. The sound of about 25 M-16s and P-90's aimed, and at the ready, right at you.

I looked around the Gateroom, slowly, takin it in. Everything looked the same, except that is, for... him. I kept my gaze locked on him, my eyes locking with... mine.

"What the...!" No, no, no! I quickly realized what had happened immediately, and new that I was pretty much screwed at this point. I'd be locked in the iso cells or some other holding cell, and they wouldn't believe me. I know, we did it when Samantha O'Neill came through our mirror years ago. "Ah, For cryin' out loud! Not again!" I slumped to the ground at the end of the ramp, leaning my head in my hands.

"Who the hell are you!" I could tell he was trying not to shout at me, but I knew that tone, I'd used it probably millions of times before. There was something else in his voice, though. Fear. I wondered if I had ever let that slip in my voice.

"I'm you," I answered quickly. I stood, unclipped my P-90 and laid it, along with my sidearm, at the base of the ramp. I approached him, noticing his uniform, and saluted sharply. "Colonel Jonathan O'Neill, USAF, Sir!" I didn't try to hide my sarcasm and I could tell he knew it.

"Colonel," he replied, nodding. He walked over to a box on the wall and pushed a button. "SG-1 to the Gateroom, Dr. O'Neill to the Gateroom."

"Hey, we don't have any of those," I joked, hopefully releasing some of the tension. Wait... Did he just say...? "Dr. O'Neill?" I questioned him.

"Uh, yeah. My wife."

I knew what that meant. I'd seen it before. Thirteen, well, fourteen universes, thirteen Jacks with enough balls to end up with her. I wanted to know, though, find out how different this reality was from ours.

"Sara?" I asked. So far my original marriage to her was the one thing that stayed the same in every reality.

"No," he said quietly, shaking his head.

The door to the Gateroom opened and I watched Daniel, Teal'c, and Major Charles Kawalski, well Lt. Col. according to his uniform, enter and stand at attention in front of Jack.

My jaw dropped at the sight. "Teal'c, what's with the hair?" There was about an eighth of an inch of fuzz growin' on top of his head, and no sight of the gold tattoo of Apophis on his forehead. He gave me a fleeting glance before returning his gaze to Jack. "Sorry."

That's weird, talking about myself, him, using my own name.

Daniel was standing next to Teal'c at attention, in full uniform. His hair was close cut, Air Force style, still the same shade of brownish blonde, with just a little grey poking through. The first thing I noticed was that he had no glasses or contacts. Small difference, but obvious to me.

What astonished me the most though, was when Jack referred to him as "Major Jackson". Daniel? In the Air Force? Never would I have imagined that one.

"Major Jackson, would you please escort 'Colonel O'Neill' to one of the holding cells, for now." He gave me a skeptical look and glanced up at the control room window.

I followed his gaze to see Carter standing, watching us from above. I could only see her from the shoulders up. His Sam was just as beautiful as mine, but there seemed to be more joy written on her face. I saw that look a few times. When her dad was still alive after everyone thought he was going to die from terminal cancer, when I returned from Edora, though she doesn't realize that I saw her, and when she found out that I care about her, a whole hell of a lot more than I'm supposed to . Of course she's happy though, she's got him, just like he's got her. But, there's something more to her. The look on her face says so much more.

I turned back to Daniel, realizing my presence had just dawned on him. The look of shock and disbelief on his face evidence that he hadn't noticed me before. He quickly shook it off and motioned for me to follow.

"It's okay, Space Monkey, you'll get used to it," I tried to reassure the baffled scientist. No, Jack, the baffled Major. He shot me a glare over his shoulder.

"So," I decided to break the ice. "How'd you end up in the Air Force? Our Jackson's an archeologist, through 'n' through." I grinned at the thought of our Jackson's antics. "he susally ends up in the infirmary after every mission."

"Couldn't pay for college. Let the Air Force do it for me. I _am _an archeologist," he replied. This was the first Daniel whowasn't just like ours, dead or never have been involved. He was actually quite the contrary, and cocky. Reminded me of me in my younger years. Maybe that's why I got along so well with ours, there was that little hidden piece of him that he let get along with me.

We approached the holding cell. It looked just like the ones we had back atht eh SGC. I wasn't really surprised, it was always the same. I politely stepped inside. I'd learned my lesson after the first time I'd accidentally ended up in an alternate universe and had gotten my knee smashed in. They had thought I was some new Goa'uld weapon.

"Look, I don't know who you are, or where you came from, but you'd better just save it for the General." He shut the door behind me and I could hear him walking away.

Now it was time to figure out how truely different our realities were. Sam and I are married, normal AU for what we've seen, Daniel's military, that's a first, Teal'c has hair, not so strange, but no gold tattoo, and Kawalsky's alive again, pretty normal, but had gotten a promotion. Now I just had to find out about Hammond, and not to mention it was pretty obvious Carter'd never been military.

I paced my cell like a trapped tiger, literally. I was starting to seeth, even though I've become pretty used to this, it being _my_ thirteenth alternate universe, Daniel being to one without us. I just didn't understand how I got here. I couldn't remember seeing any sort of those quantum mirror things or whatever, I dont' know, that was really Carter's area of expertise.

I sat on the bed, finally deciding to relax until someone came for me. It was a little unnerving. This was the first time I'd ever been in this situation without Carter and I wasn't too sure I could explain any of it to these people. I mean, yeah, I sorta understand it, but I'm no diplomat and she could explain it so much better than I ever could.

The door opened and Jack stepped calmly into the room. He stood silently in front of me, his hands shoved deep into his pockets, deep in thought.

"Follow me," he said, finally, as if it had been the hardest decision of his career.

I stood and followed him to the briefing room. I knew they'd be there, we always went there. The ensammble was a little different though. There was a kid, maybe about fifteen or sixteen, looked just like I'd always thought Charlie would at that age.

"Charlie?" I barely choked out, my voice catching in my throat.

The kid's head shot up and I watched Jack's eyes drop, full of sorrow. He had caught the hope in my voice.

"Sorry," Jack said quietly. "I take it yours is...?" He trailed off. He started clicking his pen rapidly, a sure sign he was nervous.

"Dead? Yeah," I answered abruptly. I was still hurting from Charlie's death, and so was he I could tell. I knew I had been getting my hopes up, but we had seen it twice before. Once, nothing had happened, but Sara had still left me. The other, Charlie had shot Sara, not himself. Both situatios were just as bad.

"Shot himself?"

"Mmm hmm," I nodded back.

"I take it you and Sara stayed together?"Jack looked at me, I saw a spark of hope in his eyes.

"Why do you say that?"

"The first hame to exit your mouth when I mentioned my wife." Yeah, so I had. I mean it was the logical choice.

"She left me, during the Abydos mission. I cam home, my things were packed so I moved out," I shrugged. It was old news, who cared.

"I'm sorry," Jack replied. Wow, this man was deffinitely not me. This universe was far different than I had originally anticipated.

"So, who's this?" I asked him bluntly, shoving my thumb in the direction of the kid. The curiosity was driving me nuts.

"My son, J.J." he answered. I could see the pride shining in his eyes.

"Dad!"

"Sorry... _John_." Jack smiled, teasing the boy.

I watched them carefully. This had never happened in hte other realities. Well, we had come across on where Sam had been pregnant, but that was the closest it had gotten. "Hmmm. So I can figure out what's going on, could you give me your history? I need to know where we differ."

_A/N: okay there's the beginning. Next few chapters will all be the history of the au. thanks! please review._


	2. Frustration and Forgiveness

**Ch. 2**

**FRUSTRATION AND FORGIVENESS**

Bang! Bang! Bang! Captain Daniel Jackson stood rapping on the front door of Colonel Jack O'Neill's house.

"Sir! C'mon, open up! It's Cpt. Jackson!" he shouted, knowing full well Jack could hear him on the other side.

The rain was coming down hard now. Daniel was glad now that Sam had reminded him to grab his rain poncho on the way out of the base. Thunder crashed somewere off in the distance.

"Whaddya want?" Jack muttered, opening the door not quite all the way. He wasn't in the mood for visitors. Not now, not ever. He took a sip from the glass of scotch he held in his hand.

Daniel didn't answer right away. He wanted to check on Jack, make sure he was okay. Letting the Colonel know that, however, would be a serious blow to the man's ego.

When Daniel didn't answer fast enough, Jack started to close the door on him. Daniel threw his foot in the way, blocking the heavy solid oak door from closing all the way. The door bounced back, knocking Jack's hand and spilling some of the liquer.

"Dammit," Jack muttered under his breath.

"What's goin' on, Jack? You've been holed up here for weeks." Daniel forced his way into the front room, standing sternly in front of Jack. "You didn't put in for leave; you're AWOL. They're about ready to court marshal you."

"So let 'em," he mumbled through his drink. He was in no hurry to get back to work. Other plantes could wait. Right now he was perfectly content to wallow in his own misery, drowning his sorrows in alcohol.

"Jack, I miss Charlie too, but this just isn't right. I thought you crossed that bridge and burned it on the other side," Daniel said, taking the glass out of Jack's hand. Jack was so far gone he didn't even put up a fight. "You just fell off the face of the planet. What's going on?"

"What's it look like?" Jack retorted, snatching his glass back and downing the last little bit left. "This is a new bridge, with a new river."

Daniel circled around, noticing for the first time the house seemed too quiet, too empty.

"She's gone." Jack threw him and unopened manilla envelope. He didn't need to break the seal to know what was inside. The papers had been making their way into their lives since Charlie's death.

Daniel opened the envelope and pulled out the papers. He stared blankly for a minute before replying, "Oh, Jeez, Jack. I'm sorry." He tucked the papers back into the envelope and tossed it on the coffee table. "Have you tried calling her. It's been weeks since we've been back, maybe it's given her some time to think about it."

"She won't answer her phone. And she's had 3 years to think about it. I'm not coming back to work," Jack grumbled.

"Maybe you should put in for furlough. You'll have more time to think about it," Daniel suggested. "Don't sign those,not yet. I've known you for years and I've never seen you give up anything this easily."

"Hey! I don't need my 2IC telling me what to do, Captain!" Jack shouted. He threw himself into the easy chair.

"Fine, Colonel. How 'bout your friend?" Daniel said, the hurt in his yeyes betraying the calm in his voice.

"I think I've known you a little longer than you realize. I had you tagged Spec. Ops. before you even knew who I was. Friends angle? Little bit worn. What if you went home to Abydos to find Sha'uri gone?" He knew what Daniel would say, and he silently congratulated himself on the fact that his ability to turn the tables on any conversation was still in prime condition.

"I had to leave her to come back here! I was retired remember?" He threw the furlough papers on the coffee table next to the manila envelope.

"Oh for cryin' out loud! Apples to oranges, Captain! You're going back! You get to see her again." Jack sat forward in the chair, leaning his head in his hands. Man, Daniel's annoying!

"Fine, Colonel! You do what you want." Daniel paced back and forth in the living room. "Have you left any messages for Sara?" He knew how much Jack hated answering machines and voice mail.

"No," Jack said quietly. Why did Jackson have to go there? Everybody knew he would never leave messages on anyone's machine, ever.

"Maybe that's all she's waiting for." Daniel's suggestion stung, but Jack knew he was right.

"I'm not going to leave her any messages," Jack replied stubbornly. "And I'm _not_ coming back!"

"I didn't want to use these…" Daniel threw another set of papers on the coffee table. Jack saw his name printed on the top sheet.

CRAP!

He knew the higher powers would find some way to get him back there, he just didn't think they would use Daniel in that way. But still, court marshaling him? For cryin' out loud!

"All right! All right, you got me." He threw his scotch glass against the far wall. It shattered and fell into a heap on the floor.

The pile of glass worried Daniel. It looked like Jack had done this at least once before.

"Um, Jack… How many of those have you gone through?" Daniel asked nervously.

"I don't know, check the office."

"This is crazy Jack! What the hell are you doing?"

"That's insubordination and disrespect of a superior officer!" Jack jumped up to where he was less than and inch away from Daniel's face.

"You're no officer! Look at you, you're just some old drunk! Never mind, I'll see you later." Daniel gave up, seeing the lost look in his best friend's eyes. He figured if Jack was giving up on himself, why shouldn't they? He stormed towards the front door, stopping short as he reached for the knob. He shook his head. No, he couldn't just give up on his best friends.

"Daniel," Jack said, his voice sounding flat and deflated.

Daniel turned around, slowly, avoiding any eye contact with Jack.

"That comment about Sha'uri…" Jack trailed off softly.

"Thanks. I know," Daniel replied. He walked slowly back into the living room, his eyes falling on the coffee table. Jack was ruffling through the papers lying there. He must have found what he was looking for; he pulled a pen off one of the lamp stands.

Oh, no! Daniel noticed the manila envelope was empty. He panicked. Oh, man! HE could feel a sneeze coming o.

"No!" Achoo! "Jack." Achoo! "Don't." Achoo! "Sign those!" A-CHOO!

"Daniel?" Jack was confused at this sudden outburst. "You told me to!"

"What? No… I didn't… I… Wait, what are you talking about?" Daniel slumped into the chair next to Jack's.

Jack sat there, looking at Daniel, concerned. A slow gin started picking up in the corners of his mouth as he realized what Daniel had been thinking.

"Furlough, Daniel," Jack said smugly.

"Oh, right."

Jack handed the papers back to him. "You can let Hammond know that I _will_ be back, eventually."

"Okay, I will." Daniel smiled, standing to leave.

"I know you're in a hurry to get home…" Jack stood to let Daniel out.

"Yeah, so…" Daniel walked to the front door. "Make sure you talk to Sara."

"I will, thanks. Tell Sha'uri and Ta'ashra I said 'hi'."

"You should come out to see them yourself," Daniel replied. "Tay keeps asking where you've been. She really misses you."

When Jack and the others had left Abydos, Daniel had stayed behind, not really wanting to leave the planet he had helped save. He gave Jack a formal letter of resignation and stayed with Sha'uri. Six months later Ta'ashra was born. It surprised, mostly Jack. Sam had suggested it might have had something to do with the days being longer (they were thirty-six hours) and the pull of the moon. Or something like that, Jack hadn't really been listening.

Jack had been going back to Abydos once a week for nearly a year, but that had since changed to once a month, for budget reasons, they told him. He had been rather upset about that, seeing as how much he truly enjoyed going there, though he would never admit it.

The people of Abydos, who now included Daniel and Ta'ashra, had been his saving grace after Charlie… No! No, not now. He wouldn't think about it. They had saved him from complete self-destruction. And now he felt like they were all part of some huge cosmic family.

Man, had it really been that long since… Stop it, Jack! You don't have time for this.

"She has? She's only 3, Daniel." Jack gave a faint smile. He missed playing with Daniel's little girl. It made his visits seem like work.

"You've been coming around so much, she just got used to you being there. She started asking questions as soon as you missed your visit the first time." Daniel hadn't been sure what to say to Ta'ashra to help her understand that Uncle Jack just wasn't feeling very well lately.

"Okay, you got me. Just give me a little more time."

"Just let us know, Jack." Daniel pulled his poncho over his head and patted his friend on the shoulder. He ran through the rain to the car, knowing he had finally talked some sense into his best friend.

Jack closed the door and stood in the entryway to the living room. He should call Sara now, he knew, but maybe he'd clean up the glass first.

Sara was at work when Jack finally got a hold of her. She'd seen his name on the caller ID, but decided to ignore him for the time being. Her phone flashed "four new messages", all from Jack. It'd taken him long enough to finally leave a message, she figured he could wait a little longer. Her plan backfired.

"Sara," her secretary rang through the intercom. "Jack's on the line."

"Tell him I'm out to lunch or something," she replied with a sigh. So he was desperate enough to try her office. She could play this card.

"He knows you're here."

What? How could he? "Tell him I'm going to have to call him back."

"Okay. Are you up for a visitor?" the secretary asked.

"Oh, sure, send them in." She didn't really want to see anyone, but it gave her an excuse not to talk to Jack. She could hear the door click open.

"Please sit down," she said without looking up from her paperwork.

"Hi, Sara," she heard in that familiar deep voice.

"Jack!" she startled, knocking her paperwork off her desk. What was he doing here? And why had he stayed after she had so obviously blown him off on the phone? She knelt to pick up the spilled sheets off the floor.

"Here, let me help you with those." He bent down next to her. As he reached for a piece of paper, his hand brushed hers.

Sara quickly jerked her hand away. "No, I got it!" she snapped back. "Sorry, Jack. I just wasn't expecting to see you here."

"That's all right. I wouldn't expect to see me here either," Jack grinned. He knew what needed to be said, but he had never been too good at apologies. He'd better say something, the elephant in the room had seemed to be growing. "So," he picked up. "How've, uh, you been?"

"Best as can be expected, I guess," Sara answered.

"Listen, Hun-"

"Don't!" Sara interrupted. "Don't call me that. Not right now."

"Okay. Anyway, I came over to see if you were free for lunch. Maybe we could talk a bit." Jack stood still, a rarity with him, ready to turn and run when she rejected him, which he was certain she would.

"I, uh, I can't today," Sara said. Jack wants to talk? She was in shock. She never thought he would be the one to start a conversation. "We have meetings all day and-"

"No, that's okay, I can take a hint. I'll be seeing you, I guess." He approached her, kissed her gently on the cheek and walked towards the door. What was he thinking? He knew it wouldn't work.

No, Jack! Please come back!

"Jack, wait. I just said I couldn't do lunch today. How about dinner tonight?" What had prompted her to do that? It had to be this new attitude of his. He'd never been willing to talk to her after Iraq. Charlie's death had just made it worse. It'd been years since he had come to see her at work.

"Sure, I'd like that," Jack replied with a smile. She'd missed that smile. It was comforting; had always been reassuring. It had signified everything would be alright, until it disappeared. Now that she saw it again, it was almost like old times.

"8:00, you know where," Sara told him.

"I'll see you then." He gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek, and flashed that wicked O'Neill grin that shone bright through his eyes. "I love you, Sara O'Neill," he whispered gently in her ear.

7 pm, an hour before his "date" with Sara, found Jack in front of the mirror trying to weed out the few grey hairs he had found. What would Sara say? He laughed at the thought of her picking on him for his hair. He quickly ran his hand through it one last time, and checked to make sure he hadn't missed any spots while shaving, or cut himself too badly.

_This is it,_ he thought. _My last chance with Sara. Don't blow this, Jacky-boy._

He carefully pulled on his dress shirt, trying not to ruffle it. He straightened his tied and grabbed his sport coat. The Air Force would be staying behind on this mission, but he tucked a zat into its custom holster at the small of his back. He threw his pager on the bed, set his phone on vibrate, and shoved it deep in his pocket.

Jack felt like he was back in his teen age years on his first date again. _Get a hold of yourself, O'Neill! You're just meeting your wife for dinner, it's no big deal._ He had to remind himself just how normal this meeting was, but it wasn't normal. The life of his marriage hung on the success of this dinner.

He was more nervous than he could remember being in a long time. The stress was getting to be too much, he had to get out of there. It being too early to show up for their dinner, Jack decided he should go for a drive to calm down.

The small, family owned Italian restaurant was located in downtown Colorado Springs. Sara had been a waitress there when they first met. Jack had been a mere twenty-year-old, fresh our of flight school, top of his class, celebrating with his friends. Sara had been their waitress.

Sara had been attracted to Jack not just because of his good looks, but because he had not outright hit on her. Oh, he had flirted with her and she had a feeling he'd been checking her out behind her back. He had yelled at on of his buddies for trying to lay down a pick up line on her. When she had gone back to the kitchen, she'd burst out laughing at this wonderful guy who actually didn't seem to be trying to get in her pants.

They had become close friends over the next year, Jack always staying up late to take her out to coffee after getting out of work. After that year, Jack finally asked her to dinner. He took her to their restaurant, to the same table where they had met. At that point, Sara had gotten a new job.

A few years later, Jack asked her to marry him at the same restaurant, same table. They had their wedding reception there, the year after that. Their anniversary dinners, same restaurant, same table. It was where Jack had found out they were expecting Charlie.

When Charlie died, though, they had fallen apart. They had stopped going to their special place. Neither of them knew why. Perhaps it had been too painful a reminder of happier times.

Arriving to their dinner early would show Sara how serious he was. As he pulled into the parking lot a quarter to eight, he was still debating whether to go inside or not. He had parked the car and sat for a moment, running through his options, when the setting sun reflected off a vehicle nearby. Jack looked to the side ot realize it was Sara's purple Neon.

She was already there! Now he really didn't know what to do. If he went in now, he might look desperate, but if he waited too long, she might not take him seriously.

No! He'd better go in now, just play it cool. As he walked into the building, the host stepped out from behind his podium.

"Ah, Colonel O'Neill! Right this way please. Your wife is already seated," the man said, his thick Italian accent rolling through.

Jack followed him through the familiar pathway he had traveled so many times before, though never had he been so nervous. They approached the table. Jack nodded to the host and sat across from Sara. The host left them with their usual drink order.

"I got here early, so I ordered your drink for you," Sara said, taking a sip from her water glass.

"Thank you. I tried to get here early, but I see I'm just not as good at that," Jack said dryly. He cringed. He should have thought before opening his mouth, but he was just too used to it. _Better wing it, Jack. You've screwed up big time now._

"Not fair, Jack, don't start," Sara muttered, trying not to get angry. She'd had enough of his attitude over the past few years.

"No, you're right. It's not fair and I'm sorry." Jack lowered his eyes to the table, ashamed. He quickly glanced at the wine bottle, but resisted the urge to drink. If Sara wasn't going to drink any of the wine, he wasn't either. "I know you're angry with me-"

"No, Jack. I think that's our problem. I'm not angry anymore, but you are. Don't get me wrong, I was upset. In fact, I was extremely angry with you. Our little boy, our perfect Charlie, died because of you. Or at least that's what I thought at first, but after a while I realized that blaming you wasn't doing any good, and it wouldn't bring Charlie back. By the time I had realized this, though, we had stopped talking. I let myself understand that you didn't kill him, but you wouldn't know that! I've missed you, Jack, and not just since we've been apart." Her eyes teared up as she rested her hand on his. "You left me a long time ago."

"I know, Sara, I-"

"You know?" Sara cut him off.

"That's what I wanted to talk about. I was all set to just let you walk out of my life. Daniel helped me realize what a mistake that would be. I didn't _try_ to push you away, Sara. I just didn't know how to handle my problems. When Charlie died, I was okay because I had you, even if I never showed it. When I came home last month and you weren't there, I died. I'm glad you didn't see the sorry state Daniel found me in this morning," Jack ended with a sad grin. "I want to start over again. I want you to be as happy as we were before even my 'incident.'"

"Jack?" This couldn't be the same could shell of a man she'd known for the past few years. That man, Colonel O'Neill, who had stood silently at attention at her son's funeral.

"Sara, I want to make it up to you. I want to heal the wounds I caused. Most of all, I just don't want to lose you again."

"Oh, Jack. I don't know. There's just so much…" _Hurt_. She didn't want to say it, knowing their now fragile states of mind.

"Let's talk about it. I know this whole mess is my fault. After Cromwell left me, I was bitter and hateful, but Charlie…" Jack's eyes filled, the tears almost spilling over his lids.

"It's okay, Jack. We can talk about him," Sara said quietly. She wrapped his hands in hers and stroked them softly. Was he crying? No, but he was definitely close. This was a side of her flyboy she had never seen before.

"It's still hard," he said, his emotions threatening to choke out his voice. He leaned in closer, just to be near her. "I'm sorry you had to deal with his death alone. I was too selfish to see what my depression was doing to you."

"This whole thing, it really wasn't all your fault. Charlie… wasn't your fault," Sara replied calmly, running her finger the length of his arm.

"It was _my_ gun, Sara!" he nearly shouted back. How could she be so calm? She was talking to the man who killed her son. "Besides, you said so yourself."

"Jack, I forgave you long ago. I realized it was the only way I could move on. You need to do the same." She gave a little hint of a smile in the corner of her mouth mixed with deep concern.

"What if I won't? What if I… I can't?" He said, sorrowfully. "Our son is dead because of me."

"Charlie had a wonderful life because of you. Remember that. We were really great, weren't we?"

"The greatest," Jack replied. He smiled and gazed into her eyes. He wanted it all back. Everything. He wanted all those happy times and the painful memories of what had been.

"Jack, I…" Sara started.

"Please, come home," Jack asked, his eyes portraying the silent plea he was screaming inside.

"Are you going back to work?" She looked up at him, then back down at her food, a sadness floating around her.

"Unfortunately, I have to. There's still too much I have to do. I really wish I could tell you, and this time I mean it, but you wouldn't believe me even if I could." He didn't want to disappoint her again.

"No, it's okay. I really want to. I know how much you need your work," Sara replied, a smile crossing her face.

"If that was only the half of it," he said quietly, hoping both that she'd heard and that she hadn't.

"I would love to have the old Jack back, but I know that can't happen, and for once, I've realized I can live with that."

Jack grimaced. The words stung him to the core. "I don't want you to have to '_live with it._' I don't want you to suffer anymore."

"I can live with it because while you've changed, I have too. _We_ lost _our_ son and I think _we_ should have clung together instead of driving each other away."

They were sitting almost touching each other now, so close. Sara turned and laid her head on his shoulder, her hand on his thigh. Jack put his arm around her, letting her relax before dessert. "I love you," he whispered into her ear. He could feel her smile against his chest.

"Jack, I just realized something," she said softly. "You haven't had anything to drink except water."

"You haven't either," he replied. "I just thought that if you weren't, I wouldn't."

"I ordered for you because I figured…" She trailed off, not wanting to finish.

"That I would be a wreck and would need it," Jack finished for her. "It's okay, I understand."

"I'm sorry, Jack." A solitary tear slid down her cheek.

Suddenly, Jack jumped, spilling his water across the table. "My phone," he smiled sheepishly. He flipped it open, took one look and tucked it back in his pocket. "It's just Daniel, he can call back."

"Jack?" Sara cocked her head to the side. "You've never done that before."

"Special night," he replied. His facial expression quickly changed, contorting into a grimace. "He's calling back again."

"So answer it."

"No, no. I purposely left my pager at home and told Daniel to leave me alone so this wouldn't happen. I don't want to talk to anyone else tonight," he explained.

"It's been a long time, Jack," Sara said softly, a tear in her eye.

"Too long," he added. "You think we could give this one more try?"

"I'd like that. You know, I didn't want to leave."

"I know," he replied.

"But I had to get your attention. I wanted you to see what you were doing to yourself. Daniel came to see me the other day, after you didn't show up to work for two weeks. He was quite concerned," she faintly added.

"He had reason to be." Jack sighed. His phone was vibrating again. "Sorry, better find out what's going on."

He opened his phone and leaned back. "Captain, this better be good."

"Sorry, Colonel. You're needed back at the base."

"Hmmmm, no. I told you not to call me tonight, Daniel." He leaned his elbows on the table and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Thor says he needs to talk to you."

"You can tell Thor that his skinny little butt is welcome at my house any time." Jack hung up and settled back into the booth.

"What was that about?" Sara asked, leaning back against him.

"Oh just a friend," he said vaguely.

"You expect me to believe _you_ have a friend, and his name is Thor?" Sara said, skeptical of Jack's explanation.

"Mmm, yeah." Jack smiled that amazing smile Sara loved so much. "Maybe you can meet him someday." He looked deep into her eyes. "So… where were we?"

"I was just telling you how Daniel and I were conspiring against you," she smirked.

"It's a good thing you did." Jack grinned and wrapped his arms around her. "I know it hasn't seemed like it, but I _do_ love you. I may have lost sight of that for a while, but I never stopped. Every mission I've been on since the day I met you, I've always focused on coming home to you. When you left, I just lost it. I just want you to be happy."

"I know, Jack. I've always known. I just felt so… left out. Like you were two people and I only knew one of them."

"I never meant for that to happen." Jack tried to look into her eyes as best he could. "Now I just want a second chance. I'm sorry, for everything."

"Oh, Jack." The tears flowed freely now. She didn't bother trying to wipe them away.

"Will you come back home?"

"Yes," Sara smiled.

_A/N: Okay so there's the end of ch. 2. More of au jack's story to come._


	3. An Unexpected Surprise

**An Unexpected Surprise**

Jack walked, no, more like strutted down the hall on SL 28. It was his first day back at the SGC and he felt _good_!

"Hey, it's nice to see you again, Jack," Dr. Samantha Carter said, bumping into him as she rounded the corner.

Sam was the team's engineer, theoretical astrophysist, really. As a civilian, she'd been hired to work on the Stargate the first mission. Afterward, she'd become a permanent member of SG-1.

"You, too, Dr. Carter," Jack said smiling.

"Jack?" Sam inquired.

"Yes?"

"Is something wrong?"

"Mmm, no, why?"

"Well, you're, um, smiling."

"Yep!" Jack turned and continued down the hall, whistling.

Sam shrugged and jogged down the adjoining hallway. If that wasn't _the_ weirdest thing…

**-------------------**

"Colonel!" Daniel greeted Jack, Sam and Teal'c as they stepped out of the 'Gate.

"Captain," Jack replied smoothly.

Daniel turned to a pillar beside the 'Gate and knelt down in front of it. What was behind there, Jack couldn't see, but he had a fair guess.

"You can come out now, Hon. It's only Uncle Jack."

Daniel's daughter, Ta'ashra, immediately ran out from behind the pillar, squealing.

"Unka Jack! Unka Jack!" she screamed, jumping into his arms. "Where'd you go?"

"Hey, my little pal!" Jack said smiling. Kids, they were his thing, his life, until Charlie… Playing with Tay each visit had almost brought him back. "I had some things to take care of before I could come back to see you," he told her sweetly. It melted his heart to see her eyes. He gave her a hug and ruffled her hair. "I'm sorry, but I can't stay long this time."

He stood with Tay still clinging to his shoulders. "Sorry to come and go. This was just to say we're back in action."

"So this means you and Sara…" Daniel trailed off.

"Yeah, she moved back in," Jack nodded.

"Wow, took you guys long enough. It's been, what, three months?" Daniel sighed.

"She moved back home that night, when you knocked some sense back into me."

"Why'd you wait so long to come back?"

"We needed a little time to ourselves before I ended my little 'vacation'." Jack reluctantly set Tay down and watched her run to her father. He missed that feeling. Their house seemed so empty now, even with Sara at home. It wasn't the same without Charlie.

He gave a little watery eyed grin at Tay as she clang to Daniel's leg.

"Sir?" Daniel said, suddenly official, trying to bring Jack back to the present.

"Huh? Sorry." Jack looked back at Daniel and shrugged. "You know, Sara's been acting a little strange lately," Jack said, walking through what could most comparatively been called the foyer. Or maybe a lobby? Jack smiled. Maybe a reception area?

"Like how?" Daniel asked. He wasn't sure what was going through his friend's mind, knowing it was probably more than just a few things. He followed Jack, Tay clinging to his hand.

"She kind of, hugs me… oddly. I haven't seen her wear her own clothes in about two weeks. She's been working from home most of the time." Jack held out his hand so Tay could swing between him and her father.

"If you're that concerned, take her to see Janet. Or even your own doctor," Daniel suggested.

"You know, I think she's already done that," Jack said seriously.

"Really? What do you think?" The two men exited the pyramid and headed towards the village Daniel now called home.

"I have my ideas, but I'll hold back until I know for sure," Jack replied. They both looked down at Tay swinging between them, Jack's grin broadening.

Jack stepped calmly through the Stargate and down the ramp in the Gateroom of the SGC. He smiled contently, halting in front of General Hammond.

"Welcome back, Colonel. Briefing immediately, follow me." Hammond led the way to the briefing room.

Jack grinned, knowing what was going on. Hammond was trying to get him get him home sooner. It seemed that when Jack went home early, he came back happy, and a happy Jack meant a happy team. A happy team was a productive team. It wasn't just Jack either, though. Most of the team leaders were like that.

Hammond sat at the head of the briefing table, Jack sitting directly to his right. "How'd it go, Colonel?"

"Just fine, sir. Nothing out of the ordinary," Jack replied.

"I expect your report on my desk first thing in the morning. Dismissed." Hammond stood and left the room.

Jack practically ran to the locker room, just barely taking the time to check to see if the sign was switched to "Men" before he ran in. Stripping off his dusty BDUs, he grabbed a towel and headed off to take one of the fastest showers in his life. He just wanted to get the fine layer of dust off that seemed to collect any time he visited Abydos. He loved seeing Tay, Sha'uri and Daniel, but he could do without the sand.

Stepping out of the shower room, he dried off his hair with the towel and grabbed his civvies. As he pulled his shirt over his head, his eyes fell to the pictures taped to the inside of the locker door. His family, Charlie. Jack blinked back the tears as he stared at Charlie's school picture, the one he'd brought home the day… Jack tore his eyes away. No, he wasn't going to do this anymore. Charlie was gone. He'd done his grieving and being a miserable pain in the ass wasn't going to bring him back. He would be happy remembering the fun he'd had with his son and how happy they'd been.

He pulled his leather jacket out of the locker and held it for a moment, looking between it and a photo of Sara, Charlie and himself.

Charlie had helped Sara pick out the jacket for him for Christmas right before Jack had been sent to Iraq. When he'd left, he'd placed the jacket on one of Charlie's hooks, just in case he didn't come back. But he had. Four agonizing months later, he'd made it home. Charlie had been ecstatic.

Jack threw the jacket on and smiled, heading for the door and out of the mountain.

He met Teal'c at the elevator. "Hey, T," he said coolly.

"It is good to see that you are back again, O'Neill," Teal'c responded.

"Thanks, you too. I'll see you tomorrow morning." Jack nodded and stepped into the elevator.

Teal'c turned up the corners of his mouth. Translated, it was one of the largest grins Jack had ever seen from the stoic Jaffa. As the elevator doors closed on Teal'c's still ginning face, Jack thought to himself, '_Man, it's great to be back!_'

**--------------------------------**

Jack quickly, but carefully pulled his truck into the driveway. He hopped out whistling and carrying the groceries Sara had called the base and asked him to pick up. He was so wonderfully happy, he'd been given a second chance and he wasn't going to blow it.

He shuffled the bags, trying to get to his house keys, but before he had a chance to put the key in the lock, the door opened. He nearly dropped the grocery bags right there on the front step.

There, right in front of him, stood Sara, in just his shirt and boxers. She leaned against the door frame, her eyes peering into his. She just _leaned_, nothing else.

Jack slowly moved around her, never taking his eyes away. Shuffling into the kitchen, he practically threw the groceries down, being only careful enough to make sure they didn't fall. He didn't know what had gotten into Sara, but he was sure he was going to enjoy it.

"You know," he said with that unique O'Neill grin. "I could've sworn you had clothes when you moved back in here."

She giggled, finding his smile breathtaking as usual. She breathed in his sweet scent as he enveloped her in his arms. She'd always felt safe with him, but after Charlie things had changed. Now it was as if he was back to the man he'd been before. He pulled her in, kissing her slowly.

She loved the way his lips brushed hers, the gentleness behind the kiss. He moved into it, pressing against her. Her stomach suddenly lurched and she had to break away from his embrace. She ran to the upstairs bathroom without giving him an explanation.

"Sara!" Jack called after her, worry straining deep in his voice. He heard the bathroom door slam as he started up the stairs.

"Sara, Honey, can I come in?" He knocked on the door, knowing full well that each time she got sick was different. He didn't know the best way to react to her, so he just let her lead him.

"Please," he heard her plead from the other side of the door, her voice barely above a whisper. He slowly opened the door, moving gently into the room.

Sara was kneeling on the floor, ready to heave again. Jack sat on the side of the tub, and started rubbing her back. He didn't say anything at first, letting her relax in his arms.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, not really wanting to disturb her.

"I will be." She gave him a weak smile as she tried to stand. Jack helped her up, still holding onto her. They walked to their bedroom, Jack laying her gently on their bed.

"Rest," Jack said, pulling the covers over her shoulders. "I'll go unpack the groceries." He kissed her forehead and left the room, staring at her. She smiled back as he walked out of sight.

When she was sure Jack was all the way downstairs, she jumped up and ran to the bathroom, frantically searching for her toothbrush and the toothpaste. She had to stifle a yelp of joy at the discovery of the two coveted items. She brushed her teeth, ridding herself of the awful taste. She would tell him, tonight, she finally decided.

Jack was just folding up the last of the grocery bags to put them away, when he heard the soft pat of bare feet across the hardwood floor.

"I thought I told you to rest," he said, trying his best to sound fatherly. He turned around and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm feeling much better now." She nuzzled against his neck, feeling fully comfortable with him right there by her side. "How was work?" she decided to ask. "I know you can't give me details, but…"

"No, I know. It was okay. Nothing big, went to visit Daniel. Came home. Same old, same old," Jack smiled.

"Okay," Sara nodded. "I can accept that. It's more than you used to give me. How's Daniel doing?"

"Pretty good. He's, uh, stationed, in the desert," Jack replied hesitantly.

"Yeah, sure Colonel O'Neill," Sara joked.

"What would you like for dinner?"

"Forget dinner," Sara smiled. "Come upstairs with me." She pulled him along by the hand.

Jack grinned and willingly followed her.

"Jack?" Sara whispered. He looked down into her eyes. Her expression told him she was about to apologize for something.

"Shhhh. Don't speak," Jack said softly, enjoying their union. He held her close to him, their skin rubbing wonderfully together. Their clothes, well actually _his_ clothes, had been discarded on the floor, happily.

The soft tones emanating from Sara's throat indicated to him she was enjoying their activities as well. He ran his hand through her hair and she rolled her head to the side. She slowly opened her eyes and promptly screamed.

"What's wrong?" Jack asked frantically.

"Colonel O'Neill." He heard that familiar, small, almost computerized voice say his name, but he didn't want to believe it. He didn't have to turn around to know who it was.

"Thor," Jack stated solemnly. "Anybody ever tell you, you have _really_ bad timing!"

"I am sorry, O'Neill, but your, situation, made it impossible to bring you on board. We need your help." Thor's image fuzzed in and out in front of them.

"Okay, just let me get dressed, then you can come and get me," Jack said, sounding defeated. He quickly got out of bed and found his clothes.

"Jack, what's going on? What the Hell was that thing?" Sara was scared, Jack could feel it.

"Remember my friend, Thor?" Sara nodded, her eyes wide. "That was him." She closed her eyes and shook her head.

"At this moment, I can't tell you anymore than that, but I'll see, okay? Don't worry, Thor's a great, um, person?" Jack explained. "I'll be fine."

Sara got out of bed and approached him, throwing his arms around his neck. She hugged him with all her might.

"We have to talk when you get home, okay?" she told him quietly. She kissed him softly and stood back.

"I'll be home as soon as I can. It might take a while, ya never know with these guys." He shrugged somewhat jovially.

The room was suddenly filled with a bright white light. "I love you," Jack said as he disappeared.

"All right, Thor. What the **_HELL_** is going on?" Jack shouted.

"We are sorry, O'Neill. We are in need of your assistance," Thor answered.

"This better bee good." Jack tried to glare, but Thor was one of his best friends. It was hard to stay mad at the little guy.

"We were interrupting-"

"Ya think!" Jack snapped back. "Sorry, but did you have to scare my wife so bad?"

"We could not bring you on board, such as you were," Thor tried to explain yet again.

What was it with this guy? "So you've said. I've seen you bring up two people before."

"We could not bring up just you, but until we ran our scans we thought we could transport your wife with you," answered Thor. "Why do you engage in the ritual of procreation without any need to?"

"We needed to, Thor. Believe me, we need to still," Jack responded, a grin on his face but agitation in his voice.

"After your need has been met, you should not continue that action for some time."

"You know what? I'm not even going to try to figure out what that's supposed to mean. I stopped trying to understand you a long time ago," Jack replied. "Okay, so what do you need help with?"

**---------------------------**

Sara was asleep when Jack returned home. He noticed she'd put his shirt and boxers back on and was curled up under the covers. He'd found her in this position most of the times he'd returned from missions over the years.

He stripped down to his boxers and crawled in next to his wife, wrapping his arm around her waist and settling in behind her. She didn't stir when he moved like she normally did. Jack suddenly became alert, checking her breathing and pulse, but they checked out fine. Something just didn't _feel_ right. He couldn't place it so he decided not to worry about it. Sara's soft rhythmic breathing quickly put him to sleep.

**---------------------**

Sara gently awoke to the soft morning rays shining through the window. She snuggled back against her husband, who… wait, Jack was back?

She quickly sat up to make sure it was really him. It was. She hadn't heard him come in the night before, but judging by the way he left, she wasn't sure if she would have.

"Jack," she nudged him. "Jack, wake up."

"Huh?" he answered groggily. He gently opened his eyes and smiled. "Hey, you're up early," he said, spying the clock. It was quarter to six. Sara usually refused to open her eyes before seven.

"Jack, is it really you?" she asked nervously.

"Nope, I'm a copy. My real name is 'Comoniwannalayou'." He smiled mischievously. "Yes, of course it's me."

"Jack you've been gone for a week." Sara was concerned, something just wasn't quite right. "General Hammond called for you when you didn't show up at work. I told him what had happened and he just got real quiet, said 'Thank you' and hung up."

"It was only supposed to be for an hour. Believe me, Thor got a good tongue lashing for interrupting us." Jack pulled Sara back so she was leaning against him. "I'm sorry, but the Agard are our allies and when they need a really dumb idea, they call me. Don't worry, Thor's allowed me to tell you everything and Hammond has some papers he needs you to sign."

He nuzzled up to her and put his arms around her waist. "So, where were we?" Jack grinned and pulled her down to him.

Jack held his wife close, not willing to let her sit up. She giggled playfully as she struggled against his strong arms.

"Okay," she laughed. "Jack, c'mon, I need to go to the bathroom, let me up. And _you_ need a shower."

He watched her throw on his t-shirt and walk away. Yup, now he knew it. He could put his finger on what had been bothering him. And the suspicions he'd had when talking to Daniel, those were now confirmed as well.

He crawled out of bed after her, not bothering with clothes and walked to the bathroom. He stood there, leaning on the door frame, watching her brush her teeth. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her as she finished rinsing.

"What would you like for breakfast?" she asked, turning around to face him. She leaned against the sink and grabbed his hips, pulling him closer to her.

"Surprise me," Jack responded, grinning. He gently kissed her, then broke their embrace to start his shower. "I'll make it quick," he said, hopping in.

Jack came downstairs to find Sara dishing out two of the biggest omelets he'd ever seen onto their plates. His eyes bulged at the site.

"Wow," he said. "You, uh, must be hungry."

Sara just grinned and sat down next to him. She immediately dug into her food. Jack sat there, amazed.

"So what's this talk we're supposed to have?" Jack suddenly broke out.

Sara almost choked on the mouthful she had been chewing. Jack had never been so keen on talking, but now it seemed like they did it all the time. Sara wasn't sure if she'd ever get used to this new side of him. She just stood there, watching him.

"Thor said some things about us that were a little confusing," Jack said, breaking the silence. He could tell she was nervous, but he couldn't help playing dumb.

"Oh, yeah? What did he have to say?" Sara asked suspiciously.

"He said he's sorry for scaring you, but he couldn't take you with me. When I asked him why he told me that if I didn't already know he didn't have the right to tell me. Personally I think he's been hanging out around Earth too much. Then he said we should stop…" Here it was where Jack started snickering. " 'The ritual of procreation.' That's a direct quote." Jack was full on laughing now, something he'd just recently started doing again.

"I'm pregnant, Jack," Sara blurted out.

Jack's eyes bulged and his jaw dropped. His fork fell to the plate as he searched for something to say. He knew this was coming, and thought he was prepared, but she said it so blatantly it startled him. A small grin crept across his face.

"Really?" he asked, the goofy grin still plastered where it was.

Sara nodded. She wasn't sure what to read out of Jack's reaction.

"How far along are you?"

"Four months," she nervously answered. She could tell Jack was doing the math in his head, trying to figure out when this had started. His eyes grew wide.

"You knew!" He jumped up and started pacing the room. "You. Knew. When you left, you knew. What happened?"

"We weren't on anything close to good terms. We were just doing it because it was something we just… did. I suspected and got scared. When you left on that mission, I ran. I was so scared. Of you, of another life, of what happened to Charlie." Sara started crying, her tears falling into her eggs.

Jack ran around behind her and held her tight. She leaned her head against his should and cried into him. He stroked her hair in comfort, whispering softly to her.

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. Why didn't you tell me sooner, though?" he whispered into her ear.

Sara sat up straight to explain clearly. She wiped her eyes quickly and continued, "I found out for sure while you were gone, after I had sent you the papers. I didn't know what to do. My father doesn't know, even though I stayed with him. When we settled everything, I couldn't find the right time to tell you. I was going to tell you last week, just before Thor showed up."

"I suspected something, but I wasn't sure what. Is that why you were wearing my clothes, to hide it from me?" Jack asked. The hurt in his voice stung Sara's ears. She winced.

"I wasn't exactly hiding it. I just didn't want you to find out without me telling you. I'm still scared, Jack." The tears started flowing again.

"I know, Honey. I know." Jack didn't say anything else, he just held her. He waited until she was done crying before he spoke again.

"Are we ready, Sara, for another one? I mean after Charlie?" Jack was shaking.

"I don't know, but whether we're ready or not, we've got another one on the way," Sara answered. "I just, what if I screw up again?"

"You didn't do anything wrong. What we really should have done was teach Charlie about the dangers, instead of chasing him away. Maybe he wouldn't have become so curious, and that was my fault."

"Jack, I don't blame you, and I'm sure Charlie wouldn't either. We'll just have to do our best." Sara gave a weak smile.

"Of course," Jack replied. "I love you, so much." He hugged her close, kissing her neck softly.

Their breakfast forgotten, the two of them sat together, enjoying their embrace. Jack sighed deeply and placed his hand over Sara's womb. She rested her head on his shoulder, completely relaxed.

_A/N: Okay how'd you like? Like i said before this is all something i "wrote" last summer, im just getting to typing it up and posting it. I don't feel like changing anything i did to it, so if it's really crappy, please tell me. I have a hard time writing some characters. r and r, thanks!_


	4. Why?

**Why?**

Jack stepped through the Stargate last, Daniel meeting them at the bottom of the steps. A blur flew past Teal'c and Sam and latched itself onto Jack's legs.

He smiled and looked down. "Hey cutie," he said to Tay, picking her up.

"Daddy has something he says he really needs to show Dr. Carter," she rambled.

Jack looked up at Teal'c, then back over at Daniel, who looked almost nervous.

"Teal'c, would you mind escorting Ka'suf and Tay back to the village?" Jack asked in his I'm-the-boss-so-do-it tone.

Teal'c nodded as Jack set Tay down. Ka'suf had been standing back, watching, knowing he'd be asked to take his granddaughter back with him.

"You're not from their home are you?" Tay asked Teal'c, somewhat hiding behind Ka'suf.

"I am not," Teal'c answered, nodding his head.

"How do you know Daddy an' Unka Jack?"

"I watched them defeat Ra and followed O'Neill through the Chappa'ai. I have joined in their fight to one day rid the Universe of the Goa'uld."

Tay's eyes grew wide, and Ka'suf could tell she hadn't understood a word of it. He laughed and let them through the village gates.

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"I didn't want to show you this until I had it completely translated." Daniel led them into the caves where they had found the cartouche. "I was exploring one day and came across this."

The room was huge. The ceiling looked to be about 15 feet high, but the room itself was at least 50 feet square. Goa'uld symbols and ancient Egyptian writing covered the walls.

Sam and Daniel immediately broke into a fit of banter. Something about planetary shift and mathematics, Jack wasn't really paying attention, he didn't want to give up his ignorant image. He just stood in the middle of the room, staring at the 'glyphs. Suddenly, his joys and problems seemed exponentially small.

"I have returned, O'Neill," he suddenly heard behind him. It startled him, even though he knew he should have been on alert.

"Jeez, Teal'c!" Jack almost shouted.

"I am sorry, I seem to have startled you."

"Aw, gee, ya think?" Jack snapped back. He flinched as soon as he said it. He normally wasn't so calloused towards Teal'c.

"Is something wrong, O'Neill?"

"Just itching to get home," Jack answered vaguely.

"Is your wife progressing favorably?"

Jack's head snapped up, his eyes wide. "How'd you know? You know what, I don't even want to know." He shook his head and looked back up at the Jaffa. "Yeah, she's just a little hungrier than last time, but she seemed fine this morning." Jack leaned his arm on the P-90 hanging from his shoulder and watched Sam and Daniel adamantly discussing wormhole physics and history, two subjects jack never thought could fit together.

There was a clicking and suddenly, Hammond's voice came shooting out of his shoulder.

"SG-1, this is General Hammond. Do you copy?"

"SGC, this is Colonel O'Neill, go ahead."

"Colonel, you need to return to base immediately."

"Something wrong, General?"

"Teal'c and Dr. Carter can finish up there. Send Captain Jackson through with them."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow to Jack curious as to what was going on. Jack figured it better not to question Jack.

"Copy, Sir, I'm on my way back now." Jack shrugged at Teal'c and headed towards Daniel and Sam. "Hammond wants me back at the base. You guys can finish up here."

"Everything okay, Jack?" Sam asked. She looked up from Daniel's translations for a brief moment.

"I'm not sure yet." Jack was turning to leave when his radio crackled to life again.

"Colonel, the Academy hospital just called back, it was a false alarm. Continue your mission and check in as scheduled," Hammond's voice echoed in the cavernous room.

Jack threw up his arms in frustration and clicked his radio. "Copy that, O'Neill out." Then, as if a brick had just hit him in the back, Jack stiffened. _Sara!_ Suddenly, he was back at the hospital, holding her, standing over Charlie's limp, cold body.

"Sir? Is… is Sara okay?" he quietly asked.

"I'm not sure, son. We haven't been filled in."

"Thank you, O'Neill out." Jack returned to where Sam and Daniel were talking, Teal'c had joined them.

"Colonel, what's wrong?" Daniel asked, noticing Jack's face had gone deathly white.

"I don't know, I think it's Sara." Jack flopped onto the dusty dirt floor, a cloud rising up around him.

"Jack," Daniel said, becoming personal. "It _is_ Sara, isn't it?"

"I think so. The hospital called the base. Hammond said it was just a false alarm." Jack dropped his head in his hands. Sam could see a single tear hit the dirt.

"She's not due yet is she?" Daniel asked matter-of-factly.

Jack's head shot straight up, his eyes boring holes into Daniel's head. The shock on his face told Daniel Jack didn't know Hammond had told him.

"How does everybody know?" Jack jumped up. He put on his military bravado, pretending he wasn't hurting, like they had violated protocol. He quickly relaxed again, realizing who he was with.

"No, she's not," he answered quietly. The fear he now gave up trying to hide, shone through, overpowering any strength he'd been trying to portray.

"How much longer?" Sam asked. She put her hand on his shoulder, knowing he needed a nonmilitary friend by his side.

"Ten weeks." Jack's face contorted into one of hurt, fear, and concern.

"Colonel O'Neill, you're needed back home," the radio suddenly crackled to life. It wasn't Hammond's voice.

"Dammit!" Jack shouted. He turned and ran out of the cave, adrenaline pushing him harder than he could ever remember. _No! Nonononono!_ He wasn't ready for this, Sara wasn't ready for this. They couldn't lose another child. Sara couldn't handle that.

He had to smile ironically at how much he had changed. His main concern was Sara and the child instead of himself.

He stumbled in the sand, hitting his knees. He struggled to get up, using his gun as a crutch to stand up on. He continued running, ignoring the pain in his knee. He had aggravated an old hockey injury, but he didn't care. He had to get to Sara to be by her side.

The dialing process seemed to take longer than usual. He drummed a cadence on the butt of his P-90 with is fingers as he stood off to the side so he wouldn't' be disintegrated by the vortex. When the Kawoosh had settled, he ran through the event horizon.

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Jack sat in the hard plastic chair next to Sara's bed. She was sleeping at the moment, exhausted from the day's work. He held her hand, stroking her fingers, so upset he hadn't made it there sooner.

Dr. Fraiser had ridden with him from the SGC, assuring him that nothing would happen. With all their medical advances, she had told him, it would be almost impossible for anything to happen to Sara or the child. Jack desperately wanted to believe her, but the gut wrenching lurches his stomach was giving him said otherwise.

Now he was sitting next to his overly pale wife, in the hospital, over two months early and with absolutely no understanding as to why any of this was happening. He ran his hands through her dark brown hair, silent tears running down his face.

"Colonel," he heard behind him. It sounded so far away, distant. This was _not_ happening to them!

"Jack." He heard this one a little softer, closer. He couldn't bring himself to look at the speaker, so he kept his eyes fixed forward.

A gentle hand rested on his shoulder, but he couldn't acknowledge it. He remembered those hands all to well. It had never been anybody in particular, just everybody, anybody who'd ever tried to comfort him. He had felt those hands to much in the past, when his father died, when Charlie died… He knew what they meant.

"Please, don't," he whispered softly. He closed his eyes tightly, not wanting to see who it was. He knew, but didn't want to face her.

"Colonel O'Neill," Janet said softly. "We need to take some blood, from you. We found some abnormalities in Sara's."

"What type of abnormalities?" Jack asked. He refused to look up at Janet, to see in her eyes everything he feared.

"She's having an adverse reaction to some sort of bacteria. It looks like it's been lying dormant in her system for months." Janet looked away from him, purposely trying not to look at his face. She knew what he was thinking, and she was afraid he might be right.

_I killed my wife and child!_ He tried to swipe away that first thought but it just stuck like rotten peanut butter. He knew what "for months" meant. He could feel her turn away from him.

"Dammit!" he shouted, pounding his fist into the arm of the chair. The weak plastic shattered under the force, some of the splinters shooting into his hand.

Janet winced. "Colonel, this is not your fault!" She grabbed his hand and started looking it over. He struggled to pull it away, but it just mad her grip on his wrist stronger.

"I brought it back with me! Of course it's my fault!" Jack's voice elevated with every word.

"This… thing, could have been brought back by any of the SG teams and transmitted to you." She stood, picking the plastic shards out of Jack's hand. "We're transferring her to the SGC," she added calmly.

"Probably the best." His voice sounded flat, deflated this time. He was trying to separate himself from the situation, she could tell, the worst thing he could do right now.

"She needs you, Jack. Don't hole up on her now."

Jack didn't look at her. He didn't need to, his body language told her everything she needed to know.

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Now, two hours later, Sara was secured in the infirmary, Jack's throbbing, bandaged hand was the least of his worries. The bacteria, they now knew, had been brought back by Jack. He wondered if this was what Thor had meant by stopping their "ritual of procreation."

As the thought finished running through his head, Thor showed up next to him in holographic form.

"We are sorry, O'Neill. We were called by your Dr. Carter. We did not realize the bacteria would be harmful."

Jack stared in disbelief. They had known about this when he returned!

"What!" Jack screamed.

"When we first detected the organism, it was improving your immune system. It seems to be trying to do the same here. The child is being treated as a foreign entity."

"There's nothing you can do, right? No technological interference, huh?" Jack said bitterly.

"Most of the System Lords have been eradicated. That treaty no longer exists."

"But…" Jack led on. He knew there was something Thor wasn't telling him.

"We do not know how we can help without causing the death of one or the other. We do not know what we can do to help."

Jack started fuming, his face turning bright red. They sent him home knowing there was a foreign organism in his body and now his family was paying for it. He could possibly lose one or both of them. His hand started throbbing again with his raised blood pressure.

"J… Jack?"

He quickly turned from Thor.

"Sara, honey," Jack said leaning closer to her. "How do you feel?" He held her hand, trying to avoid pulling the IV.

"It hurts," she cried softly. She gripped his hand tighter, causing him to turn away and wince. "I caught that," she tried to smile. "What happened?"

"Temper," Jack ashamedly answered. As much as he didn't want to, he forced himself to look into her eyes.

"Sara," he said quietly. "This, what's happening to you, it's my fault."

"No, Jack…" She winced again as the pain racked through her body. "It's not."

"You don't understand." This was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do. "What's happening… it's a bacteria I brought back with me."

"Jack, that's not your fault." Her voice tried to stay calm as her face showed her pain. "Jack, it hurts. Something's wrong." Tears streamed down her face like waterfalls.

"I know. This bacteria, it's supposed to boost the immune system, but while it's doing that it's trying to flush out anything it thinks doesn't belong. That's what it's doing to the baby. At least that's how Thor explained it. Dr. Fraiser should be coming up soon." Jack ran his fingers up and down her arm in comfort. He slowly brushed her hair out of her eyes.

"What's going to happen to us? Our baby?" Sara cried.

"I don't know, honey," he replied. He couldn't hide his fear, not from her. He wasn't going to lie to her anymore, especially now.

As he held her as close to in his arms as he could he felt her shudder and tense, the pain racing through her body evident to him.

At that moment Janet ran through the doors to the infirmary. "Colonel," she stated, all business. She studied the monitors for what seemed like an eternity. "Jack, she's going into labor."

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Sam, Daniel and Teal'c sat outside the infirmary, quietly, each one showing their worry in their own way. Sam's eyes were bloodshot from too much work and too little sleep. The chairs around her were littered with reports she was studying, her laptop balanced on her lap. Daniel paced the room, then would stop and sit for maybe five minutes before he got up and paced some more. Teal'c had put himself into a deep state of Kel-no-reem, recently once he realized his symbiote was struggling.

It had been 36 hours since they had returned from Abydos. None of them had been anywhere else on base since. They couldn't leave their CO, their family. Sam had even had a passing Airman bring her the work she had in front of her now, not wanting to leave in case they heard some news.

Teal'c slowly came out of his meditation, disturbed by Daniel's constant pacing.

"CaptainJackson, would it not be beneficial to give your body some rest?" he more like stated. His eyebrow raised, waiting for Daniel's reply.

"That annoying, huh?" Daniel gave a half-hearted grin.

"Indeed."

In the silence that followed, none of them quite knowing what to say, they could hear the familiar footfalls of General Hammond. Judging by the increasing volume, he was heading their way.

"As you were people," he said without giving them a chance to stand. "I've ordered all intercoms to the infirmary shut down for the time being. Your pagers must remain on at all times. We have civilians on base. The infirmary is the only place they're cleared."

Hammond nodded towards the team and walked on into the infirmary. He knew better than to order his flagship team home. They wouldn't leave, they would never leave, not while one of their own was in trouble.

Jack's team was just settling down again when they realized it was no longer the General's footsteps they heard. This second set, familiar only to Daniel, was getting eerily close.

"Throw this on," he said, chucking a Boonie hat to Teal'c, who responded with the usual eyebrow raise.

"Trust me," Daniel replied. "It's Mike."

"Who?" Sam asked, looking up from her reports.

"Sara's father." Daniel dropped his voice as the footsteps entered the room.

"Daniel," Mike said, nodding in his direction. The older man sat, reluctantly, in one of the empty chairs surrounding them. He put his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, worry racking his body.

"What can you tell me?" The tension ran thick through the air.

"Unfortunately, not much, Sir. We know hardly anything at all. Janet, er, Dr. Fraiser was still speculating on the possibilities last we were to-"

Before Daniel could finish, Janet walked through the doors, her scrubs still hanging on her body. The sight horrified anyone unfortunate enough to be in the room. Blood covered her frond and dripped off the ends of the shirt and down the pants. She slowly, purposefully, approached Mike, knowing who he was on instinct.

"Sir, you should go in and talk to Jack," she said without much of an explanation. She slowly shook her head, knowing what he was going to ask next.

Mike numbly nodded and stood. He couldn't hear Daniel and Sam pumping the doctor for information, or even the sound of his own shoes on the cement floor, just the short uneven breaths coming from one, usually stone faced, Colonel O'Neill.

Jack sat next to the still form of his wife, staring at her, willing her to wake back up. He stroked her arm and hands gently, mostly to hide the rage he felt ensuing from the depths of his very being.

"Jack."

"It's a little boy," he said, trying to avoid the topic he knew was coming. He could feel his eyes burning, wanting to let the tears flow, pushing them back all the same.

"The second she saw him, I thought she would be okay. Her eyes brightened, she smiled." He couldn't help it now, the tears were pushing too hard.

Mike stared down at his baby girl, grief surging through his body. He wanted to blame Jack, almost.

"She gave me a second chance at being a husband, a father and at life. Now I'm no longer a husband, our son is so small he's in danger, too, and life is just laughing at me!" He flopped back in his chair, the rage slowly receding but replaced by nothingness. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel, just that he didn't.

Mike could see in the younger man's eyes he was drawing back from reality, much like he had after Charlie's death.

"Jack, what about the rest of your family?" he asked, trying to bring him back.

"You know as well as I do I have none," Jack replied, a coldness to his voice and eyes.

"Then you're more of a fool than I thought you were," Mike confronted him. The words had come out harsher than he'd intended, but that didn't matter now. "There are three very dedicated team members of yours waiting outside this room, judging by the looks of them, they've been here just as long as you have."

"God, all the battles I've been through, the scraps I've gotten into, I've never seen so much blood." Jack lowered his eyes. He still felt sick to his stomach.

"What happened, Jack?" Mike asked, anxious to know how his daughter died.

"This bacteria thing, 'immune boosting' made her body react to the baby like a disease. It thinned her blood as well. She couldn't clot and when she hemorrhaged, she just… bled to death. The more blood we put in her, the more she bled. She finally told me to stop and let her go. She said it hurt to much. Then she told me she loved me and… and Jonathan."

"Jonathan?"

"When he was placed in her arms, she looked at me and said, 'He's a junior, Jack.' I can't deny her that."

"No, I don't suppose you can," Mike replied with a small grin.

"Sir, I feel I should tell you that…" He paused, suddenly unsure of whether he really wanted to say what he was thinking.

"Yes, son?"

"The bacteria, I brought it back with me, from a mission I was on. We didn't know it. The, um… people I was with recorded it as a beneficial bacteria and let me go home."

"That doesn't make it your fault, Jack. This is about as much your fault as Charlie's death was." Mike rested his hand on Jack's shoulder.

"That's comforting," he replied sarcastically.

"Jack, you didn't pull that trigger on your son and you didn't inject that bacteria into my daughter."

"Um… well, in a way… I… did." Jack gave his half-squint/grimace and looked away.

"What? Oh… Ooooh." Mike suddenly realized what Jack meant by that and was a little more than taken aback.

"I didn't _know_ she was… expecting She didn't tell me."

"I see."

"What am I supposed to do now?" The question was obviously vague, but Mike could tell what he was thinking.

"You'll figure something out, you always do."

Jack stood, leaned forward and kissed Sara's head. "Goodbye, my love," he cried to her. His tears splashed across her lifeless face. He stood back up, reluctantly released her hand, and placed his hand on Mike's shoulder. "I'll leave you alone with her."

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Jack rolled over to face the cold, empty half of his king sized bed, a surge of grief washing over him. His bed had never seemed quite so large until now. He fought back the urge to throw anything he could reach and grabbed Sara's pillow, hugging it to his chest.

_Have to get up, got a debriefing._ Jack numbly slid out from under the covers and plodded his way over to the bathroom.

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"I'm putting SG-1 on two months downtime. Captain Jackson, Teal'c, you're free to return to your homes. Dr. Carter, if you would like, you are cleared to join any other SG teams until then." General Hammond stood and closed his leather folder. "Dismissed."

The team stood, Daniel facing Jack.

"Two months?"

"Dr. Fraiser projects that's when J.J. can be released," Jack responded solemnly.

_A/N: Okay i hope you like it, next chapter is Lonely, so i hope i can get it out fast enough. Please r and r.!_


	5. Lonely

_A/N: Okay, well this one covers about a year. The section from where Jack's sitting in his office w/ computer problems on is all the same day on J.J.'s birthday. _

**Lonely **

Daniel stood outside Jack's house, Ta'ashra limply holding his hand. He held her there tightly, knowing how much she wanted to run through the grass. He hated denying her the fun; there was not grass on Abydos, but he felt more comfortable letting her run around in the backyard.

He knocked gently on Jack's front door, just loud enough to be sure Jack would hear it inside. The absence of a response concerned him after their last "confrontation" a little over six months ago. He knocked again, maybe sounding a little more impatient this time.

"Daddy, he can't hear you," Tay stated matter-of-factly. She put her free hand on her hip and tapped her foot on the ground.

"I can't knock any louder, Dear. J.J. could be sleeping," he explained to her. "Where'd you pick up that habit?"

"Dr. Sam used to do it to Unka Jack."

Daniel laughed. He'd forgotten the antics and dynamics of their team. Well, not totally, but if anyone had seen them recently they would have never guessed the team to be as close as they were.

"I don't think he's sleeping, Daddy."

"Oh, yeah? You sure about that?" Daniel joked.

"Yep," Daniel suddenly heard behind him, causing him to jump. Tay started giggling uncontrollably.

"Hi, Unka Jack!" she managed to get out amonst the giggles.

"Hey, Sweetie." Jack stopped pushing J.J.'s carriage to hug her as she ran over. He missed her so much, a smiling face in his life.

Daniel approached the carriage quietly. "Hey, Buddy," he said softly, leaning over the edge. J.J. peered up at him. "He's so small, Jack."

"Fraiser just released him two weeks ago," Jack replied softly.

"So… um… how are you doing?" Daniel knew Jack wouldn't want to tak about it, but now was as good a time as ever. "Nobody's seen you since-"

"Yeah, I know. Just need a little time. Spent the first month at the cabin, restocking in, since the Doc wouldn't let me in to see J.J. at all. Said she didn't want him to get sick with that weird bacteria in his system, and since we're not really set up to take care of a premature baby, she sent me off." Jack watched closely as Tay played with J.J.'s hands.

"Be careful, he's fragile, Darling," Daniel warned her.

"Maybe we should move this to the backyard." Jack pushed the carriage up to the door. They carefully made their way through the house. Daniel was surprised to see how different, how _clean_ it looked.

Jack parked the carriage in the kitchen and pulled J.J. out. The group made their way to the back porch. A small swing was set up for J.J. back against the house, secured to the wood of the floor they now stood on. Jack placed his son in the swing and started it.

Daniel glanced his way, grinning like a madman.

"What?" Jack said, sounding guilty of something, nothing in particular.

"Never thought we'd see this side of you," Daniel joked, hoping to get a smile out of his CO.

"Yeah, never thought I'd see it again, either," Jack replied sadly.

"Hey, Jack, maybe you should come up to the base-"

"For cryin' out loud, Daniel! Give me some _time_!" Jack didn't let Daniel finish his sentence. He was still grieving, let him be. He immediately regretted his outburst. "Sorry, just a little stressed."

"Jack, J.J.'s over two months premature, and you're trying to raise him on your own, of course you're stressed." He paused. "I was going to suggest you move onto the base for a little bit, so Janet could keep an eye on him."

Jack raised his eyebrow, a habit he'd obviously learned from Teal'c.

"Sam and Janet's idea. Hammond's already cleared it. We all wanted to come over and tell you, but we figured that might not be such a great idea, invading you like that, so I cam alone." Daniel let just one corner of his mouth turn up. "If you move to the base, Janet can keep a closer eye on him. The entire medical staff has already offered to watch him while we're away. Overnighters, Shau'ri will watch him for you."

"Let me think about it." Jack leaned back in his chair, watching both Tay playing in the grass, and J.J. falling asleep in his swing.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Jack, that look suits you," Sam joked, meeting up with him in the hallway. He had a diaper bag slung over one shoulder, carrying J.J. with the opposite arm. J.J. was so small his head rested in the crook of Jack's arm, his feet lying by his fingertips.

_He looks good,_ Sam thought. She mentally kicked herself for even allowing it to enter her mind. _He just lost his wife!_

Jack smiled sarcastically down at her. "Thanks, I try."

"Want me to carry something?"

"Sure." Jack handed Sam the bag carefully. He was glad to have a friend who was technically outside the military, especially since she was a woman.

_Stop it, Jack! You're just feeling lonely._

"No one thinks you're asking for help, if that's what you're worried about," Sam reassured him softly.

"I was on my way over here to retire, again, when Jackson stopped by. J.J.'s just not old enough yet." They turned down the next hall towards Jack's new quarters.

"We're glad you didn't. The team still needs you." Sam smiled, her eyes shining blue. They were offset by her bright blonde hair hanging just below her shoulders.

Jack smiled back, a true grin this time. His first since Sara's death. He shifted J.J. whose balled fist hit him in the chest.

"He's strong, like his mom," Jack said quietly. He pushed the tears back, not willing to let them show.

"His dad, too." _D'oh!_ Sam mentally winced. She did not just say that, did she? The look on Jack's face told her she had.

She quickly tried to cover it up. "We're all truly sorry, Jack. Well, this is the best we could offer," she said as they reached his quarters. General Hammond and Dr. Fraiser were already waiting for them.

"Colonel," Hammond said, nodding to him. "Dr. Fraiser will show you your new quarters." The General turned and left the room.

"Sir," Janet started. "This is your office, which connects to your sleeping quarters, which in turn connects to J.J.'s room. His room has been soundproofed. A transmitter was installed with a speaker in your room. We didn't want the klaxons bothering him. You personal radio has been programmed to receive that channel as well," she explained. "I'll leave you to get settled." Janet left the room, closing the door behind her.

"Jack."

"Sam."

Neither knew exactly what to do next. Jack sat on his desk, still clutching his son to his chest. The silence wasn't exactly uncomfortable, just unsure.

Sam sat in his chair, directly in front of him. She had been dropping by his house periodically since J.J. had been released. He hadn't really paid much attention to it, besides being grateful for the help. Sam had been happy to help him out, letting the woman in her overrule the scientist during her visits.

Jack had welcomed them. It was difficult; more than he had anticipated. He hadn't been around much during Charlie's infancy, something he had always regretted, but more so now. He couldn't understand how Sara had done it.

"How're you doing?" Sam asked, venturing to break the silence.

"Hmph," Jack grunted solemnly. As horrible as he still felt, he didn't really want to talk about it.

"Jack, we've been working on this project together for years, I'd like to think we've become friends." Sam sounded almost hurt, but unsure.

"Sorry." Jack looked away. "We have."

"So talk," Sam ordered.

"Don't really feel like it," he commented back snidely.

"Okay, fine," Sam replied. She stood to leave the room. "If you need anything, just let me know."

"I need you," he said softly, just barely loud enough for her to hear.

She was appalled! Sure she felt somewhat of an attraction to him, but the man had just lost his wife. Wasn't two months a little _too_ soon?

Jack had to chuckle at the look of pure disgust on Sam's face. It was just too much.

"Not like that," he replied, lightly grasping her elbow. He pulled her gently over to where he was sitting. "You said that we're friends, I agree. You want me to talk so here's your chance. I'm going to lay J.J. down in his room, then we are going to sit here and talk.

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Jack awoke in the cold, dark room in the base he'd been calling home for the better part of a month now. He could see his breath, or so he thought. He realized it was steam he could see floating into his bedroom.

Sam had been coming in early mornings and sometimes set his tea water to boil so it would be ready when he awoke. He looked over at his watch and saw, as usual, that it was 0600. He smiled as he stood to start his day with a wonderfully hot cup of tea.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"All right, people. Welcome to P3X-217. Spread out and do your thing."

SG-1 landed on their newest exploratory planet. There were no signs of life, but hey, that didn't mean there wasn't any. There were too many trees for Jack's liking, too many places for hostiles to hide.

Daniel's roaming caught the corner of his eye. No matter how military, the guy just couldn't seem to meld that with scientific, and right now he was in search-out-former-signs-of-civilization mode. Jack nodded for Teal'c to go with him.

Sam was just finished taking some samples as Jack approached her from behind.

"Any luck?" he asked, seemingly on edge more than usual.

"Nothing spectacular. Almost finished, though," Sam replied, capping the last four test tubes. "There!" she said triumphantly. She placed the test tubes into the MALP's holding tray and sat on the steps leading up to the Stargate.

Jack glanced around, quickly checking that it was still okay and sat next to her.

"I'm moving back home soon," he told her, staring at his feet.

"So I've heard," Sam said with a smile.

_What?_ "But I… I wanted to tell you myself, our friendship being so close and all." Jack moved closer to her, easing some of their tension.

"I know. That's why I didn't say anything." Her smile was still plastered across her face, but a new sadness shone through. "I'm gonna miss J.J.:

"Carter," Jack laughed. "I'm moving off base, not off world. Just because I'm going home doesn't mean you can't come by for visits…" He looked up at her. "Even when he's asleep."

"It's about time you went home. It's been almost six months since…"

"Yeah, I know. I've realized that sitting around on base, torturing Airmen, and being just miserable isn't going to bring her back. I'm… moving on," Jack said. It was the first time he admitted it, even to himself. He still loved Sara, would always love her, but he had to move on, for J.J.'s sake, for his own sanity. It was possibly the hardest thing he'd ever had to do, but he did it.

"Good for you. I know it's hard. I remember how much I hurt the first time I saw my dad look at someone else after my mom died. It took me a while, but I finally realized how much we needed to move on." Sam avoided looking at Jack, not wanting him to see the pain on her face.

"That's what I'm worried about. I mean, if I were to ever get remarried, what happens when J.J. gets older? I don't want him to feel like I betrayed his mother." Emotional Jack, the newest Jack. He still didn't know how to handle this thing he was doing, seemingly out of his control.

"He's so young, I don't think it'll matter. That's so many years in the future, I wouldn't worry about it until the time comes." Sam bumped her shoulder against his upper arm, giving him a reassuring smile.

He smiled back, making eye contact and gave her a friendly, one armed hug. "Thanks, Sam."

Daniel approached Jack and Sam, followed by Teal'c. "There's nothing here, sir," he reported.

"Let's move out," Jack said, standing up.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack sat in his office, his feet resting comfortably on his desk. He stared at the laptop in front of him, willing it to work. There was no way he was going to give the techies the satisfaction of fixing the problem for him.

Carter! That's it, he'd call Sam! She'd know how to fix it. He jumped up and half ran to the phone, picking it up and dialing her extension.

"Dr. Carter," he heard from the other end.

"Hey, Sam, you busy?"

"Just getting some things together before I head out to get cleaned up."

"Ah, good, could you come to my office before you leave? I've got a little project for you."

"Colonel." Sam always playfully emphasized his rank whenever she was about to chide him for something. "Shouldn't you be home setting up?"

"That's what last night was for."

"I'll be over in a minute." She hung up on him, but he just shrugged and replaced the receiver.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The soft knock on his door jarred him out of the light doze he'd accidentally fallen into. He wasn't sure if it had been real until he heard it again. He groggily stood and opened the door.

"Sam."

"What's up?"

Jack walked her over to where his laptop sat on the desk. "Won't work," he said, pointing to the machine. "I think someone messed with it… yeah that's it."

_Sure,_ Sam thought to herself. "Pack it up and I'll look at it later tonight."

"Okay," Jack said watching Sam leave. "1900, don't forget."

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Jack sat at the table watching his son play in his first birthday cake. It was a bittersweet moment for him, a marking of the day he had lost his wife and gained a son. In some aspects it still felt like yesterday. At night, when he'd lay in his king sized bed alone, the pain would come rushing back. Those nights he would either lie on the floor in J.J.'s room, or bring J.J. to him. There were some nights when sleeping in J.J.'s room was just too painful, it being Charlie's old room.

Something sticky and cold slamming him on the forehead brought Jack back to reality. He could hear the laughter of his friends as he came to realize what happened. He grabbed a napkin and wiped the chocolate cake off his forehead. He looked to where J.J. sat, that unique O'Neill grin plastered to his face, with his hand buried deep in the cake.

He glanced up to see the smiles on his friends' faces before cracking into a fit of laughter. Yep, this moment was definitely more sweet than bitter.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack walked into the kitchen, stretching.

"J.J.'s in bed." He stood behind Sam, watching her. "You don't have to help me, ya know."

"I have to stay late anyways, might as well make myself useful," she shrugged. She rinsed the dishes and sat them in the drying rack.

"I don't think I've properly thanked you for all you've done for us." Jack leaned against the counter. "I really appreciate the help."

"It's nothing, really," Sam grinned back. "Besides, I have to fix your computer or else you won't be able to finish those reports." She turned, and leaned back against the sink, facing the same way as Jack.

His left hand inched towards her, almost with a mind of its own, almost. He tried stopping it, knowing he shouldn't, but it just seemed impossible.

Sam must have seen what he was doing because she jumped slightly and moved towards the center of the kitchen.

"So, uh," she started. "Let's take a look at your laptop." _Oh,_ she cringed. _Wrong choice of words._

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Two hours later and a full disassembly and reassembly of the faulty piece of hardware found the machine up and running smoothly.

"There you go, Jack. All set." Sam grinned proudly. She shoved the computer in front of him.

They were sitting on his couch in the middle of his living room, the laptop sitting on his coffee table. Jack turned on the couch, his knees bumping her. He leaned closer to her, his eyes becoming soft and serious.

"Thank you, again." He tilted his head in and brought his lips to hers. He kissed her gently, slowly. She didn't move away, so he leaned in closer. His brain finally kicked in screaming at him to stop. He pulled away, avoiding her eyes.

"Jack," she said softly. He couldn't read the tone in her voice. _Don't let him go!_

"I'm… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have… it wasn't… I'm sorry," Jack said standing. He led her to the door. "I should probably get some rest, goin' offworld tomorrow and all." He rattled off the lame excuse before he knew what he had said.

"Uh, yeah. See you tomorrow." Sam turned and walked out the door, too fast to hear him say, "I meant that 'Thank you,' Sam."

_A/N: Okay, hope you like! next chapter is **Abydos**. Okay, Please review!_


	6. Abydos

**Abydos **

Jack, Sam, and Teal'c stepped out of the 'Gate to the empty foyer on Abydos. Something didn't seem right. Jack's hair on the back of his neck pricked up. For the first time since their original mission, they hadn't been greeted upon their arrival.

"O'Neill, I do not like this feeling I am getting," Teal'c stated, his eyes canvassing the area.

"Yep, know the feeling big guy." Jack raised his P-90 to the ready.

A young Abydonian boy ran into the building, frantically waving his arms. "Na-ne! Na-ne! Don't shoot!"

"What's going on?" His Colonel voice took charge.

"Dan'yer sent me to find you. Apophis has com to Abydos. He has kidnapped Sha'uri and Ska'ara. We must hurry before the Jaffa use the rings." The boy ran, heading back to the village.

"C'mon, let's go find Jackson." Jack took off after the boy, Sam and Teal'c following.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Ska'ara! Psst, Ska'ara!" Daniel hissed in a loud stage whisper.

Ska'ara pulled himself to the bars of their cell. Daniel was on the other side calling him over. He had his P-90 ready, his ears alert. His basic training kept his emotions at bay during this critical mission.

"I'm going to need you to keep everyone calm and away from the doors." Daniel started messing with the hinges, but Ska'ara couldn't see what he was doing.

"Sha'uri!" Ska'ara said sharply to Daniel. "Apophis took her! For Amonet!"

Daniel's head jerked up quickly. "Where is she? What about Ta'ashra?"

A small child stepped forward, clinging to Ska'ara. "How do you like your 'son', Dan'yel?" he joked. "I thought it best to keep her with us where she can be protected."

"Thank you, Ska'ara. You did good." Daniel's eyes shone with relief as he took in the sight of his daughter disguised as one of the guys. "Hey, Baby, it's Daddy. Don't say a word, okay. Just stick with Ska'ara and you'll be safe." Tay silently nodded and hid behind Ska'ara.

"Dan'yel, I believe Sha'uri is being kept near Apophis. Find him and you will surely find her."

"Thank you. I'm going to need you to stand back." Daniel stood and moved across the hall

Ska'ara could see him grip something in his hand. There was a small explosion on the hinges of the door and it fell open. The men rushed out of the cell and flooded the hall.

Daniel picked up Tay, gave her a hug and handed her to Kasuf. "Go with Grandpa, Darling. Kasuf, lead them into one of the side chambers. I'll meet up with you."

"I am coming too, Dan'yel!" Ska'ara turned and ran after him.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"C'mon, Captain, c'mon," Jack murmured, pushing the last of the Abydonians through the Stargate. He had heard the firefight in the ship above him, knowing it was Daniel.

He looked up to see Ska'ara running towards them. "Dan'yel and Sha'uri are close behind. Quickly, we must leave!"

Jack was about to ask what had happened to Apophis when Daniel and Sha'uri ran past him and dove into the Stargate.

"Guess that's our cue!" Jack threw Sam into the event horizon and followed after her.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Colonel O'Neill, what the Hell is going on here?" General Hammond shouted the second Jack stepped out onto the ramp.

"Wrong person to ask, General. You might want to find Captain Jackson." Jack leaned forward, resting his hands on his knees and breathing heavily.

"Report straight to the infirmary. Captain Jackson is already there." Hammond left the Gateroom swiftly to prepare for the debriefing.

"C'mon, Dr. Carter, let's go find out what's going on."

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Daniel, Sam, Jack and Teal'c made their way to the briefing room in silence. Teal'c had been sent back through the Gate to inform the SGC of the arrival of the Abydonians. He hadn't witnessed the events that took place afterwards. Jack and Sam had returned to the Gate to help the Abydonians through. Daniel and Ska'ara were the only ones to know the truth.

Ska'ara was waiting for the group when SG-1 arrived. "Dan'yel, it is good to see you well!" He jumped up and hugged Daniel tight, seeing him for the first time since their arrival.

"Okay, Captain, what's going on here?" Hammond pointed for Daniel and the rest of SG-1 to sit. Daniel and Ska'ara sat next to each other on one side, Jack, Sam, and Teal'c on the other. "I sent SG-1 there for your monthly check-in and a village came back!"

"Apophis attacked about three days before you came through. I couldn't risk sending a message to you. He took Sha'uri while I was in battle with his Jaffa. He took all the women, but only a handful made it on board his ship. He left the rest to wander the desert. The men were rounded up and brought in together." Daniel paused. "Some of the women died of heat stroke."

"I snuck onto the ship and rescued Ska'ara and the other men. They helped me release the women and I ordered them all back to the Stargate."

"Colonel," the General looked into his eyes, almost to the point of glaring. "Where were you while this was going on?"

"Teal'c was recognized as the 'Shelver' or something-"

"The Shol'va, O'Neill."

"Right, that. Anyway, we were attacked and were fending off the Serpent Guard and five battalions of Jaffa."

"Okay, continue, Captain."

"I found where he was holding the women. Sha'uri had just been thrown back for some reason. While I was helping the women escape, Ska'ara and his friend found Apophis's chambers. The 'boy' distracted Apophis long enough for Ska'ara to slice his spinal cord from behind. The Goa'uld slid out of his head, but not before he hit the self-destruct."

"That would explain being _thrown_ through the Gate," Jack said dryly.

"Sir." Daniel raised his eyes to Hammond's. "There is no planet left for these people to go home to." A tear glinted in his eye as he realized his home had been destroyed.

"We'll work on finding them a new planet, Captain. Right now, I want you all to report back to the infirmary, Dr. Fraiser would like to see you."

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Janet was waiting for them when they reached their destination. She was worried, Jack could see, but who wouldn't be after trying to take care of her own teams, plus thousands of villagers.

"Colonel O'Neill, J.J. was placed in quarantine as soon as UOA was announced. Everything is clear, you may retrieve him when you are ready." She turned to Daniel, her eyes getting softer.

"Captain Jackson, Daniel, can I speak to you privately for a moment?"

_Uh oh_, Jack thought. _Not a good sign._ He looked to his left at Sam, seeing in her eyes she was thinking the same as he. They'd better give them time to talk. He clapped his hand reassuringly on the younger man's shoulder.

"Dr. Carter, would you mind helping me calm J.J.?" He turned to Sam while leaving the room. She quickly followed with Teal'c on her heals.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack, Sam, and Teal'c sat in the commissary eating lunch. Sam sat across from Jack, J.J. bouncing on her lap. She gave the boy another small bite of cake as his father looked on.

"What do you think happened?" Sam asked the man sitting across from her.

"I don't know, but here comes Daniel now." Jack pointed to the younger man behind Sam's back.

Daniel pulled over a chair and sat next to Sam. He flopped over and laid his head over his crossed arms.

Jack glanced up at Sam and Teal'c, nodding in the direction of the food counter.

"I think we'll just go get J.J. some milk. Teal'c you comin'?" Sam stood with J.J. and walked away, leaving the men alone at the table. Teal'c laid his hand on Daniel's shoulder before following Sam.

"Daniel, what's wrong?" Jack asked, moving around to sit next to his friend.

"I don't really feel like talking right now, sir," Daniel answered through his arms.

"You made me talk during my darkest hour, it's time I returned the favor." He thought he heard a slight snicker. "Do I have to make it an order, Captain?"

"No, sir." Daniel lifted his head and sat up straight. "Our home has just been decimated. We have nothing left. And I found out what happened to Sha'uri while I wasn't there, the reason Amonet refused her." Daniel paused for a moment, looking away from his best friend. It was as if he could avoid all contact, it would all turn out to be a dream.

"Amonet… she didn't… but then… and she came through… but he was already…" Daniel was sobbing now, deep grief laden sobs of sorrow beyond imagination. Jack was surprised. Whatever it was, it was bad enough for Daniel to skip straight over his sneezing attack.

"Daniel! What happened?" Jack grabbed Daniel and turned him so they were facing each other.

"Kasuf fell on Tay for starters. He was trying to protect my baby girl and got shot. He landed on her, breaking her arm. He's dead." Daniel hung his head.

"What does that have to do with Amonet and Sha'uri?"

"Nothing, but it's part of what went wrong. Jack, we… we lost our son," Daniel finished.

"You don't have a son," Jack said, somewhat confused.

"We were going to, though. I found out about a month and a half ago, when I noticed how big she was looking. Apophis didn't use the ribbon device on Sha'uri's head. She was supposed to be the perfect, the chosen. He wanted her to experience a pain more torturous than death itself. That's what Janet had to tell me. That Sha'uri went into premature labor on the trip through the Gate and our son was stillborn."

"Oh. Daniel, I'm… sorry," Jack said, resting his hand on Daniel's shoulder. He didn't know what else to say. Daniel didn't even get a chance to play with his son the way Jack had with Charlie. "How's Sha'uri?"

"Sleeping. She's going to be there possibly until tomorrow. Tay and I are going to stay on base until she can be released, but then we're not sure where we're going to go. Sha'uri can't go with her people, too much risk."

"Well, you know, under immigration laws, she has been a citizen since you were married," Jack suggested.

"Where would we stay? I had the Air Force cancel the lease on my apartment when I decided to stay on Abydos." Daniel stood, pacing in front of Jack.

"With me, at least until you find a place of your own."

"We couldn't, it would be too much of an imposition. We wouldn't want Tay to hurt J.J."

"She's what, almost six. J.J.'s two, I think she's the one you gotta worry about."

The men laughed. Jack knew that would get a smile out of Daniel.

"Okay, Jack, I'll talk to Sha'uri about it, see what she says."

"As long as you need it, my door's open for you guys." Jack and Daniel stood together, Jack giving the younger man a reassuring pat on the back.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Dr. Carter, the Asgard have informed us they are willing to move the Abydonians by ship if we can Gate them to an uninhabited planet," Hammond said calmly during their meeting the next day. "Do you have any in mind?"

"I can think of a few," Sam reassured him.

"General, Sir," Daniel spoke up suddenly. "Sha'uri and I would like to stay on Earth."

"We can start the paperwork immediately. What about your brother-in-law?"

"He's now the leader of the village with Kasuf gone. He'll be leaving with the rest of the villagers to their new home."

"Okay then, you're dismissed."

SG-1 stood to leave, Jack allowing Sam and Teal'c to leave first. He held Daniel back and pulled his keys out of his pocket. He pulled one off the key ring and pressed it into Daniel's palm.

"Whenever you're ready to move in," Jack said and exited the room, leaving Daniel standing with his mouth agape.

_A/N: Next chapter Happiness. please r and r_


	7. Happiness

_A/N: Okay i don't know how some ppl feel about certain subjects so up the rating on this just a teensy bit, not quite up to the next level they have but up anyway. Thanks_

**Happiness **

Jack and Sam sat outside on his back porch, watching J.J. run around the backyard. He'd changed so much in three years, it almost startled Jack. He had always heard of preemies being small their whole lives, but J.J. was the exception to that rule. He still reminded Jack so much of Charlie it hurt, but he knew they were two completely different people. J.J. could never take Charlie's place, and he didn't want him to.

"He's getting so big, Jack," Sam commented, watching the boy chase butterflies.

"I know. He definitely gives me a run for my money. He's got so much energy. I feel so old lately," he joked. His sparkling white teeth glistened off the sun.

Sam couldn't help but stare at his smile. She loved seeing him so happy. At least he tried to portray a look of happiness. Only his closest friends could see the loneliness in his eyes.

Jack had said he moved on, those two and a half years ago, but Sam didn't believe him. She had yet to see him date anybody. She knew from Janet, her best friend, that he had his eye on someone, but Janet would tell her who. It was tearing her up inside, trying to figure out who it was. Daniel and Teal'c seemed to know, but they had been acting strangely around her.

Jack glanced from his son to Sam, her shining golden hair catching his eye. She looked radiant, sitting there on his back porch watching J.J. She had been his most avid supporter over the past three years, and he had gotten to know her more then, than the three years prior.

"I'm going to bring J.J. out to see his mother and brother on his birthday, even though he's so young," Jack said sadly.

"What brought this on?" Sam was startled by his change in attitude.

"J.J. saw a picture today, and asked who they were. It broke my heart." He didn't want to tell her what else J.J. had said, at least not yet.

"Well, if you want me to go with you, I will," Sam offered moving closer to him. She rested her hand on his knee.

He laid his hand on top of hers and smiled. "Thanks, Sam. I know I say that a lot, but I really do mean it." Jack leaned in and hugged her close. "Do, um, do you want to stay for dinner?" Jack asked nervously. He'd had her over before, but it had always been after she was helping with J.J. or with the rest of the team.

"I'd like that," Sam replied with a smile.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack and Sam had finished their spaghetti and were sitting at the table, watching J.J. eat. The Sauce was becoming embedded in his hair and all over his face.

"All right, c'mon Buddy. Finish eating so we can go take a bath," Jack said, smiling at his son.

"J.J. picked up his fork and over exaggerated the act of biting down on his food, grinning widely. He started giggling as the spaghetti flopped against his chin. He chewed dramatically and swallowed.

His antics set Sam and Jack into hidden hysterics. "Okay, 'Ham.' Finish up." Jack grinned and nodded to the plate.

"Can Sam stay for bed?" J.J. asked. Jack could see the hope in his son's eyes, but didn't know quite what to say. Sam and J.J. were close now, Sam being around most of the time. It was a closeness Jack had dreamed of J.J. having with his mother, at least, before she died.

"Of course," Sam replied. She couldn't deny the small boy anything he wanted so badly. She could see how close Jack and his son were, but also how much _their_ friendship meant to the child.

J.J. smiled and hurriedly gobbled up the rest of his dinner. He hopped down from his chair and brought his dinnerware to the kitchen counter.

"I'd better go start his bath water." Jack stood up and held his hand out to help Sam up.

She took it and stood, grabbing their plates and bringing them to the kitchen. She dumped them in the sink, turning on the water.

"I'll do the dishes until his bath is done." She brought the pots over from the stove and started putting the leftovers away.

"We'll come down and get you for stories." Jack turned and headed up the stairs after J.J.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"… The end." Sam closed the storybook and laid it on the end of J.J.'s bed. Jack was laying next to J.J., rubbing the boy's back slowly. Sam nodded to him, indicating J.J. had fallen asleep.

Jack carefully got up off the bed, trying not to wake J.J. When he stood, he leaned down and kissed the boy on the top of his head. He gently ruffled his hair and stared at him.

"He's such a beautiful little boy, Jack," Sam said softly as they left the room. Jack quietly closed the door and entered the hallway.

"Yeah, isn't he?" Jack boasted proudly. "Hey, uh, you want some coffee?"

"Sure," she replied, following him down the stairs and into the kitchen.

Jack pulled the filters out of the cabinet and the coffee grounds from the freezer. He set up the coffee maker and leaned against the counter. A silence fell over the room.

Sam stared at Jack, her eyes falling to his rough and weathered hands. Oh what she wouldn't give to feel them on her at the moment, running up and down her arms, over her back.

She glanced up at his face, focusing on his eyes. They weren't hollow or empty anymore, hadn't been for over a year now. She could tell he was thinking, trying to make a decision. She'd seen that look in his eyes hundreds of times before. She grinned, thinking back to all the moments she had enjoyed looking into those eyes.

"A million bucks," he said, suddenly breaking the silence.

"What?" Sam was confused.

"Your thoughts. A penny just seems so insulting. Your thoughts are worth so much more to me, but that was the highest number I could think of." Jack answered on impulse, knowing if he actually thought about it, he would lose his cool.

He gazed deeply into the soft blue pools of her eyes, her blonde bangs falling over her forehead, almost disturbing them. _'God, she's so beautiful tonight.'_

"I'm flattered," she answered smiling. That wonderful, bright smile almost brought him to his knees.

He moved closer to her, hoping maybe she could see what he was feeling. What he was feeling, those few feeling he had only admitted to himself just recently.

He hadn't been able to get that kiss off his mind. It had been wonderful, no, more like amazing. It played through his mind every time he closed his eyes, whenever he could smell her shampoo wafting off her from a distance, each time he watched her play with his son.

He had felt the way she stayed with him that night, not pushing him away like he had expected. Maybe he had read more into the kiss than what she had meant. He had thought about that almost everyday for a little over two years. He knew he was probably obsessing over it, but he saw her every day, at work or playing with J.J. He saw her inside and outside of work. The more he saw, the more he knew what was happening to him, to his feelings.

"Sam," he whispered, leaning closer to her, their eyes locking. "I…" he couldn't finish what he was saying. He leaned to only an inch away from her face. She tilted her head up to meet his, her eyes never releasing his gaze.

Their lips gently brushed together. He could taste her without ever opening his mouth. He brought his hands up to her waist and rested them on her hip bones. She brought her hands up behind his head, running her fingers through his hair, deepening the kiss.

He opened his mouth, brushing his tongue against her lips. She parted them, taking him in. He could taste her now, fully. Oh, how he missed this.

They finally pulled apart, their need for air becoming too great. They stood there, held in each others' arms, absorbed only into each other.

"I've been wanting to do that again for too long," Jack said, a small grin breaking out across his face.

"Why'd you wait two years?" Sam asked, half seriously.

"The time just never seemed right. That and I never knew your thoughts on that first kiss." He looked down at her sheepishly.

"You should have asked." She smiled back up at him.

"I know, but the opportunity never presented itself." Jack tilted her head up slightly to make sure their eyes locked. "Sam, I have a confession to make." Her eyes widened and he thought he could see a hint of fear in them.

"Oh, no, shhh, don't worry." He brought his hands up and rubbed her arms. "What I was going to say was that I haven't _needed_ you to help me with J.J. since he was about six months old."

Her eyes lit up as he spoke, a smile creeping across her face. "I guess I have a confession as well." He startled back, not sure what to expect. "Ever since that kiss, well, let's just say I haven't been offering to come over because I thought you needed the help."

Jack's grin had broadened as he brought her into his embrace. HE let out a content sigh and rested his head on hers.

"Years, Sam. We've kept this hidden for years."

"I don't think it's been hidden, Jack. I think we were just so concerned with whether the other didn't feel the same we just missed all the signals." She relaxed in his arms, perfectly content to just be with him.

He suddenly broke away from their embrace, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. "Come with me." He pulled her through the kitchen, quickly grabbing the cardboard tube from of the refrigerator. He ran to the back yard where a wooden ladder had been fixed to the side of the house. Sam knew it led to the roof where Jack's telescope was perched.

"I bought something for you for your birthday, but it just never seemed right to give it to you until now." He motioned for her to head up the ladder, following her closely, 'to make sure she didn't fall.' _Yeah right, nice view Doctor._ He smiled once more.

"What's going on, Jack?" She turned around with her hands on her hips as soon as she reached the tiny platform built into his roof.

"Hold on, I'll show you." He stepped up to the telescope and adjusted it before motioning for Sam to look through the eyepiece. She peered in and almost gasped.

Jack's telescope was top of the line, well slightly better. It'd been a gift from the guys at NASA. A projector in the back displayed the names of the stars and planets as one looked into the eyepiece.

"Can you see that cluster of stars?" he whispered gently into her ear. He was leaning against her back, his hands resting on her hips.

She nodded, ever so slightly.

Jack punched in the coordinates he read off the piece of paper that had been in the tube, into the keypad at the base of the telescope.

Sam could see the telescope focus and zoom in on one specific star mixed into the small cluster. She could see a single word appear above it: "Sam."

"Oh, Jack!" she exclaimed, seeing what he had done.

"It was originally just a token of gratitude, but it's grown to so much more. Every person who has been special in my life has a star up there." He punched the keypad again and the telescope zoomed out just a bit. Three more names appeared over stars: "Charlie", "Sara" and "J.J."

Sam stood back straight and peering into his eyes. He could see the tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you, but I will always hold a place in my heart for Sara." He held Sam tight against him, stroking the back of her head.

"You're a fool, Jonathan O'Neill," she said, smiling into his chest. He held her at arms length, confusion lighting on his face.

"Jack, you guys weren't divorced or parted on bad terms, she died, while you were still very much in love. Of course she will always be in your heart." She paused to make sure he was looking at her. "I don't want to replace her or your memories with each other. We can make new memories to keep right there next to the old ones, and I can fill a different place in your heart. J.J., I love him so much, but I think he should know about his mother, how much she loved him, and how much you loved each other."

Jack pulled her closer to him, leaning down to kiss her. Passion danced in his eyes as he took her lips with his. They parted and he moved in, his lips brushing her ear as he spoke. "He should also know how much you love him, and how much we love each other."

Sam's eyes lit up like sapphires glittering in the sun. "Do you mean that?"

"I think so, but each time we're together I grow more certain of it. I was a walking shell, just going through the motions to keep J.J. and myself alive after Sara died. When you started helping me, I started looking at you differently and suddenly I had something to live for. You've brought me so much joy these past years, I don't know what I'd do without you."

Jack's little heartfelt speech brought tears to her eyes as she pulled him in for another kiss. Her fingers interlocked behind his head as she deepened the kiss, eliciting a surprised hiss from him.

He quickly recovered and wrapped his arms around her. He could feel the passion and desire coursing through her and knew she could feel the same from him.

He pulled back sharply, catching the look of confusion flash across her face before he could explain. He reached over and turned off the telescope, still clinging to Sam with one arm.

"We should really move this inside," he whispered into her ear. His breath moving across her neck sent shivers down her spine. She nodded and followed him down the ladder.

He led her through the kitchen and up the stairs. He realized just how late it had gotten as they reached the upper hallway. Without releasing Sam, he quickly checked in on J.J. to make sure he was okay. They boy was asleep in the middle of his bed, his Clifford sheets still pulled up over his shoulders.

Satisfied he quietly shut the door and pulled Sam across and down the hall to his room. He knew where this night was headed and he wanted it to be special, not in the kitchen, or on the couch, or even up on his roof, although that sounded kind of nice, but proper and special, just for her.

He backed her up against the wall, the passion mounting in his kisses. His hands found the hem of her shirt and started exploring her heated skin. He could feel her goosebump at his cool touch.

"Jack," she moaned huskily, pushing him away. He followed her gaze back to the bed. He looked into her eyes seriously.

"Are you sure?" he asked, lifting her chin in his hand.

"Jack, if you don't-"

"No, no," he interrupted softly. "I just don't want you to feel like we have to just because we're in the bedroom."

"Oh you could never make me do anyone, I mean any_thing_ I didn't want to do," she smiled mischievously.

"Well then… if you insist," he grinned back. He pulled her backwards and laid her on the bed. He lay down next to her, stroking her hair out of her eyes.

"I wasn't planning this," he told her softly. "I don't have any condoms."

"Don't worry about it, this time," she reassured him. He pulled her close and hungrily kissed her swollen lips.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack slowly awoke to the soft light filtering through his bedroom window. A grin crept across his face as he recounted the events of the night before. He tried to move his arm but found it stuck where it was. He looked down and saw his arms was tucked under Sam, her head resting on his bare chest.

He gently rolled her onto her side and sat up. He threw his legs over the edge of the bed and found his pajama bottoms. Throwing them on quickly, he covered Sam to keep her from catching a chill. He sat for a moment, watching her sleep before heading downstairs.

The coffee from the night before had been forgotten at the time, now stood cold in the pot. He turned the machine on and warmed it up so Sam could have some when she awoke.

He could hear soft, quick steps enter behind him. "Good morning, J.J. You want some Cheerios?" He turned to face his son who had flopped himself into one of the kitchen chairs.

"Okay, Dad." J.J. smiled widely. "Is Sam going to eat breakfast with us?"

Jack stopped suddenly, surprised at how aware his three-year-old son was. An idea quickly flashed through his mind and he knelt down to J.J., smiling.

"I don't know, maybe you could wake her gently and ask." Jack patted his head as the boy jumped off the chair and ran upstairs. He stood grinning as he watched J.J. turn the corner ecstatically.

Moments later he watched as J.J. pulled Sam, wrapped in one of his large robes, by the hand down the stairs.

"Here she is, Daddy!" J.J. grinned proudly and led her to his father.

He wrapped her up in his arms and kissed her forehead. "Morning, Sleepy head," he grinned.

"Mmmm, coffee," she murmured sleepily.

"Well, it's nice to know I'm good for something," Jack laughed.

"Thank you, Jack. After last night I wasn't sure I'd be able to wake up this morning," she barely whispered in reply.

"Ooo, way to boost my ego dear. I didn't know I had that kind of stamina." He picked up the carafe and poured some coffee for Sam. "You're lucky we don't have to go into work today."

"Don't I know it."

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

It was J.J.'s fourth birthday and Jack was making good on his promise. Sam hung back a bit, allowing Jack the special time with his son. She watched him lay the flowers J.J. had picked from the cabin on the graves as he explained to J.J. who the people were. She couldn't hear what was being said, but could see that J.J. was asking questions.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack stood with one hand on J.J.'s shoulder, the other carefully placing J.J.'s wildflowers on the headstones.

The first flowers he placed on a headstone with the picture of a small boy in his little league uniform engraved under the inscription.

"_Charles Tyler O'Neill  
__1977-1987  
__Beloved Son, Gone too Soon."_

"This is your brother, Charlie," Jack told J.J., his eyes tearing slowly.

"Where does he live?" J.J. asked innocently.

Jack choked back his reply. "I don't know, with mommy I suppose."

"But…" J.J.'s voice trailed off. Jack could tell he was deep in thought. The boy had the same look on his face he himself had often been subject to. "Daddy, I've never seen anybody at Sam's before."

Jack allowed the corner of his mouth raise just enough to not feel like he was being disrespectful towards Sara.

"Charlie's body sleeps here, under the grass." Jack stopped for a moment to lay more flowers onto the next headstone.

"_Sara Michelle O'Neill  
__1951-1990  
__Beloved mother, wife and the love of my life."_

"J.J., this is your mom, here," he said shakily. "She died giving you to me." He laid his arm across J.J.'s shoulders. "She loved you so much, but Charlie was all alone. She had to go take care of him. She knew we would take care of each other."

"Why can't Sam be my mom?" J.J. asked almost sadly. He looked up at Jack questioningly.

"I don't know what to tell you, Bud. Sam loves you very much. Your mother loved you so much. We tried to save her, especially for you," Jack explained. He really hadn't been sure how this day was going to go, he didn't know how much J.J. would understand.

"Hmm," was all J.J. said before turning around to walk back to Sam. "Can I meet them?"

"No, Buddy, I'm sorry. Not for a very long time."

"Okay," J.J. ran back to where Sam was waiting and threw his arms around her.

Jack approached and gave her a small kiss. He put his arm around her shoulders and said, "I don't think he understands quite yet."

"He's only four," Sam shrugged. "He will someday."

"I know," Jack sighed.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The ride back to the house was silent. Not uncomfortable, just thoughtful. Jack was thinking about what J.J. had said about Sam. It was the same thought he'd had over the past month. They'd been together for eight months now and he was wondering where they were headed. He loved her now, he knew, and J.J.'s question had brought him to realize those feelings. He knew what he wanted to do now, what he had to do.

"Jack?" He barely heard Sam speak. He was concentrating on his thoughts while driving.

"Hmm?" he responded, his eyebrows rising. He glanced in the rearview mirror. J.J. had fallen asleep in his car seat.

"What were you thinking? You were kind of far away there." Sam rested her hand on his thigh and looked up at him.

"You'll find out, eventually. Don't worry. He pulled the Jeep into the driveway next to Sam's Mustang. He jumped out and ran to Sam's side, helping her out. He literally picked her up out of her seat and set her down gently.

"Jack, what are you doing?" she laughed.

"I don't know, I just felt like this." After Sam was on her feet in the driveway he handed her his keys. She ran up and unlocked the house.

Jack leaned into the backseat of the Jeep and carefully unbuckled J.J. He picked him up in his arms, cradling the child as he brought him into the house.

Sam quickly made her way back outside to retrieve their belongings and locked the Jeep. Earlier in the day they had thrown a party for J.J. at the park. It had seemed like half the SGC had shown up. With all the presents J.J. had gotten, they decided to just leave them in the vehicle until morning. Sam carried the utensils into the kitchen and dumped them in the sink

She hurried upstairs and into J.J.'s room as Jack was pulling the covers up to his chin. He kissed his forehead and sat on the edge of the bed.

Sam approached and sat down next to him. The two of them sat in silence for a while, staring at the boy's sleeping face. It portrayed the blissful ignorance of children. She envied him, not knowing the pain his parents had been through. She wrapped her arm around Jack's waist as he brushed his hand through his son's hair. She noticed he was holding something in his other hand.

"What's that?" she asked softly, not wanting to wake J.J.

Jack held the object in his hand turning it over and over again. "I found this photo the other night," he replied in a whisper. He handed the picture in frame to Sam so she could take a closer look at it. There was just enough light filtering through the hall for her to see that it was a photograph of Sara and Charlie together. Sara had her arms wrapped around the boy and they were sitting in a large patch of grass, looking so happy. It was not unlike the picture Daniel had snapped of her and J.J. earlier that day.

"That was the last picture on the roll I shot the day before Charlie died. I dropped it in the mail the next morning. They must have been delivered during the confusion because I was going through my closet and found the unopened envelope in the back of my closet." Jack had immediately gone and bought a solid oak frame for the picture. It was now J.J.'s birthday present, his own photo of his mom and brother.

Sam pulled out the post on the back of the frame and set it on J.J.'s dresser. "We can make sure he never loses it." She smiled at Jack, knowing he was probably nervous about her reaction.

"God, Sam, how do you do it?" She looked up at him. There was love and amazement in his eyes. "You've been so good to us the past four years and you've handled this whole situation so well."

"Jack, there is no situation." Jack looked at her, his confusion obvious. "You and Sara were married, had two kids together. You and J.J. need to keep her somewhere in your hearts. But I hope you can eventually love me to the same magnitude."

"Oh, we already do, Sam. We already do." Jack stood and held out his hand. She took it and they made their way to the bedroom.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack was the first to step through the Gate to P4C-734. Daniel quickly followed, spreading out, wary for any hostiles. The MALP hadn't shown any signs of life, but they had been deceived before. Teal'c came through followed closely by Sam. Teal'c watched over her like a hawk, she hadn't looked so good in the Gateroom.

"Okay, people stay on your guard. Daniel, do your thing, Teal'c go with him in case he finds signs of the Goa'uld. I'll stay with Sam while she takes her samples." Jack stood protectively next to Sam, he'd noticed her looking a little green as well. She gave him a sheepish grin from where she was crouched on the ground. Deep down he thought he saw a flash of fear in her eyes.

Daniel and Teal'c quickly moved off, staying alert.

"Sam, are you okay?" Jack was concerned. She had been sick earlier, staying all morning in the bathroom. She had already been in there when he'd woken up.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Her face was flushed, but she carefully stood to start her work.

"Okay, but I want you to see the Doc when we get back." Jack hugged her and returned to keeping watch.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Sam, I don't want you going through that Gate again until we know what effect it will have on you," Janet said sternly, trying to make Sam listen. Janet wanted to laugh to herself. Over the last four years, Sam had become so much like the Colonel and he like her it was almost scary.

"Janet, that's my job, my work. It's what I do to keep from going insane," Sam protested half-heartedly. She knew it was useless to argue, but she could always try.

"Sam, I want you to go home and get some rest. And talk to Jack, he might have some ideas," Janet suggested.

"How did this happen? None have ever broken," Sam muttered almost to herself. "Janet, I need to go pick up J.J. from his grandfather's after the debriefing, can I go get cleaned up now?"

"Yes, but remember what I told you. I'm sending my report to General Hammond, unless you would like to bring it to him yourself. Just keep it easy for a few days until we're sure about the missions." Janet patted Sam's shoulder and walked her to the door. Sam gave her a weak smile as she left.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Sam silently entered the briefing room and sat down next to Jack. He put a reassuring arm around her shoulders and pulled her chair closer.

She nauseously sat through the debriefing, only adding in her two cents when asked. She was only paying enough attention to answer whatever questions they had for her. She barely noticed when Hammond dismissed them.

"Dr. Carter?" Hammond asked bringing her out of her daze.

"Sorry, Sir."

"Dr. Carter, is something the matter?" Teal'c asked her. There was no emotion on his face but she could hear the concern in his voice.

"No, Teal'c. General Hammond, may I talk to you in private?" She noticed Daniel and Teal'c glancing at her, but tried to ignore the confused, hurt look on Jack's face. _Of course he's hurt, you're telling your boss before him._

She followed Hammond into his office and shut the door.

"Here's my chart and the test results from my post mission physical." She handed him the file and sat down.

Hammond sat at his desk and opened the file folder. He wasn't as shocked as she thought he would have been. It was almost as if he had expected it.

"I agree with Dr. Fraiser. I'm putting SG-1 on stand down until we figure out if this is dangerous to your health." Hammond paused, a concerned look in his eyes. He had known General Carter for most of his military career, and Sam all her life. "Does Jack know?"

"Not yet," Sam answered, lowering her eyes, ashamed. This could be detrimental to her career, although not as much as if she had actually _been_ in the military. She could remember hearing her father talk about officers within a chain of command throw away their careers to pursue a romantic relationship. All she was concerned about now was being allowed back on SG-1.

"Talk to him, Sam. We'll let you know when Janet finishes her tests. Go home and get some rest, maybe get Jack to drive you home." Hammond stood and helped Sam up.

She smiled. "He has to drive me, or he has to find a ride home."

"Tell the rest of SG-1 they can go home until further notice." He gave her a hug before she left.

"Sam!" Jack shouted as she closed the door to Hammond's office. He dismissed the Airman he was talking to and ran up to her.

"Everything okay, honey?" he asked placing his hand on the small of her back.

"Yeah, don't worry," she was feeling tired and cranky and wasn't really up to talking, especially to him.

"I don't know what's going on, but I trust you to tell me when you're ready," he said walking with her to the lab.

"Janet's sending me home, SG-1 has been put on stand down until further notice." She unlocked her door and headed into her office.

Jack walked past her to the phone as she gathered her files to bring home. He tracked down Daniel and Teal'c to notify them of their small vacation.

"C'mon, let's go home," he said, hanging up the phone.

"Don't we have to pick up J.J.?" she asked as Jack took her files and carried them for her. He was worried, after her amazing upchuck reflexes that morning and her attitude after the mission. She seemed almost depressed.

"Dad's keeping him tonight, sort of as a favor, so he says." Jack flashed his dazzling white smile down to her. Mike wanted to take J.J. fishing, seeing as it was Friday.

"I made reservations at O'Malley's for tonight. We can have a nice calm night out, just the two of us. I can still cancel if you want to stay in." Jack pushed the button for the up elevator. "You look beautiful today," he said leaning in to whisper in her ear.

She blushed as she stepped onto the elevator. Jack tucked the folders under his arm and pulled Sam close. He kissed her forehead gently. She leaned up giving him access to her lips. The kiss was slow and soft, intimate despite their location.

"I love you," he whispered, touching his forehead to hers.

"I love you, too."

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack and Sam sat at a small table in the back corner of O'Malley's; the server had just taken away their dinner plates. Jack had laid his credit card down to pay the bill.

"Sam," Jack paused, not really sure how to word what he wanted to say. It had been a long time since he had done this. He fingered the small box in his pocket, turning it over and over again.

Sam looked up at him, noticing the nervousness written across his face.

"Sam," he started again. "You mean so much to me. You started out as my friend, then my friend helping me raise my son, and now you're so much more. I love you so much." He slid off the chair and onto one knee. "Sam, will you marry me?" He opened the small box, exposing a beautiful diamond ring.

Sam jumped up, knocking back her chair. "Janet told you?" she shouted. She turned and ran out of the restaurant to the car.

Jack stood, rubbing his sore knee, grabbed the card and the receipt, and ran after her. He saw her sitting on the trunk of her car and walked up to her, rubbing his hands along her upper arms.

"You don't have to do the right thing Jack. I think I've proven I can handle myself." Sam sniffed never looking into his eyes.

"Sam, I haven't talked to Janet since my physical, and she wouldn't say a word. Can you tell me what's going on?" He lifted her chin to look into her eyes.

"Do you really want to marry me?" Sam asked, tears in her eyes. He could feel she was scared of his answer.

"I love you, Sam. Will you marry me?" he asked again.

"Jack…" she paused, her fear mounting. "I'm…" She didn't know how to tell him. She didn't want to just blurt it out. "Can we just go home for now?"

"Sam, you're obviously upset. Do you want to go back to your house?" Jack asked. She had spent an increasing amount of time at his house, hardly ever spending any time at her own home.

"No, it's okay, let's just go back to your place." Sam hopped down from her car and climbed into the passenger seat. Jack moved around to the driver's side and started the vehicle.

The drive home continued in silence. Of course halfway home, the reason for that silence changed. Sam had fallen asleep due to sheer exhaustion. Jack was now kicking himself for not automatically canceling the reservations as soon as Janet had sent her home.

As he reached the house, he pulled carefully into the driveway, trying not to jostle the vehicle too much. He hopped out of his side and ran to Sam, carefully opening the door and unbuckling her. He got his keys ready in his hand and picked her up.

Jack carried her into the house and slowly made his way up the stairs to the bedroom. He pulled back the covers and laid her down gently, pulling off her shoes and throwing them to the floor. He found her 'Jack's House' set of pajamas and changed her into them without waking her up.

He smiled, knowing how tired Janet had said she was. She had refused to say anything else about her condition, though, leaving Jack confused. She had told him to let her rest and not to upset her. Looked like he wasn't doing to great so far.

He kissed her on the forehead and pulled the covers up to her chin. He left the room to lock up before returning to join her in the bed.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Jack woke up to the early morning sun filtering into the room through the shades. The sunlight shone in Sam's hair causing an almost halo effect around her. He brushed his hand across her cheek and rolled over to stand.

He headed downstairs to the kitchen, his stomach growling loudly. He decided on cereal, knowing that if he cooked anything, he ran the risk of making Sam sick.

He finished his cereal quickly and put in some toast for Sam. Dry toast, it had always worked for him when he was sick; Charlie and J.J., too.

He sat thinking of the night before. Why had she been acting so weird lately? She had been cold to him, after the mission, ignoring him and heading straight for the infirmary. She had acted even stranger during the debriefing, and she had asked to speak to Hammond alone. What was so important, so scary that she felt she couldn't tell him?

The toast popped up, breaking him away from his thoughts. He put it on a plate and brought it up to Sam. She was just awakening as he entered the room.

"You didn't eat much last night, thought I'd make you some toast." He sat on the bed next to her, setting the plate on the nightstand. He helped her sit up and gave her the toast.

She readily ate, hoping it wouldn't come back up. She felt weak again almost immediately. She leaned her head back against the headboard and closed her eyes.

"Jack, we need to talk," she said quietly, her eyes still closed.

"About what Janet told you?" he replied nervously.

"Yeah…"

"Sam, I'm here for you, no matter what," he reassured her. He grasped her hand and held it tight to emphasize his point. Thoughts raced through his head, most of them flashing to some sort of sickness. '_She's dying,_' he thought. Of course he would jump to the worst-case scenario. '_She's got some sort of cancer or terminal illness_.'

"Jack, there's a reason I've been sick and tired, and moody, lately." Jack braced himself for the inevitable. "I don't know how to tell you this." Now he was deathly afraid. He didn't want to lose another woman he loved. "I'm uh… we're… I'm pregnant."

Sam lowered her eyes then quickly switched her gaze to the window. She caught the shock on his face, but turned away before she saw the joy. '_Oh, no, he's upset. Of course, J.J.'s still so young._'

"Sam, honey, could you please look at me?" Jack asked, the relief so evident in his voice it made Sam jump. She turned her head to look at him. "Is that all this is? You're pregnant?" He was openly smiling now.

She nodded.

"When'd you find out?"

"Yesterday, after we returned from offworld. I'm the reason we're on stand down." Sam's fingers were fidgeting, rubbing against the hem of the sheet.

"Good. How far along?" Jack held her hand, rubbing circles with his thumb.

"Don't know, Janet's not done with the tests."

"Honey, you look so upset." Sam just shrugged. "That's why you thought I was proposing? Is it so hard to believe I'd ask you to marry me because I love you?" He was hurt, she could tell.

Jack shook his head back and forth. "Sam we've been together for almost a year. I love you, and I believe that we could be so happy as a family."

"I'm sorry, Jack. I don't know what came over me. I guess I was just being a little selfish. I don't want to stop going through the Gate, but I've got someone else, well actually three more people to worry about."

"Three?" Jack asked, feigning ignorance.

"Well, the baby, J.J. and you." Sam smiled. She actually knew what she was thinking, saying, doing for the first time in over a week.

"Are you saying what I think you are?" Jack was overjoyed. His smile shone brighter than the morning sun.

"Yes, Jack, I'll marry you."

He jumped up, trying not to jolt the bed too much and hugged Sam tightly. He kissed her softly on the lips, not wanting to make her sick.

"I, um, talked to your father last month, back when I was still only most of the way sure." Jack laid down next to her on the bed. He propped himself up on one arm, the other draped delicately across her stomach, his fingers caressing her hip.

"Only most of the way…" she quoted, almost hurt. Her eyebrow raised.

"I thought I was sure, but then J.J. said something that made me realize before that point there had still been a slight hesitation. Last night, though, I was never more sure about anything." He rubbed his hand against her belly. It was amazing, his _third_ child.

"What did he say?" Sam asked. She knew J.J. well enough to know that he realized more about his surroundings than most kids his age, and he was one very _deep_ thinker.

"I introduced him to Charlie and J.J. asked where he lived. I told him I didn't know, but probably with his mother. He told me he'd never seen anyone at your house before." Jack sighed, a tear in his eye. His worst fear, well almost worst, for J.J. was now so remote a possibility it wasn't even worth glancing at.

Sam's jaw dropped. She didn't know what to say. She didn't want to take Sara's place, but that sure seemed like what was going on.

"That wasn't just it, though. He's been giving me hints all along, I think. He once asked me how he got two moms. Lately, he's been slipping up and calling you mom, but I didn't know if you noticed." Jack didn't seem to stop smiling, even at the memory of Sara. He knew she would want her boys to be happy, and that she would only want Jack to marry someone J.J. loved as well.

"Sam, you've supported me, been there for me, every step of the way, from the very beginning, and you've been there every time J.J. has needed you. Can I tell you something else?" Jack's grin grew wider. "I know what he wished for his birthday."

"Hmm?" Sam replied sleepily.

"A baby." That snapped her eyes open immediately. "A baby sister, to be specific."

Sam just sat for a moment, not moving. Slowly, almost unnoticeably, the corners of her mouth turned upwards. "I guess we'll just see what we can do for him, but you, Jack O'Neill, seem to have a knack for boys."

"You look exhausted, go back to sleep." He rolled her onto her left side and spooned up to her until she fell asleep.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Mike pulled into the driveway, mid-afternoon Sunday. J.J. was asleep in his carseat in the back. It was a long drive back from the lake where his cabin was located. He was just glad it wasn't as far away as Jack's.

Speak of the devil. Jack came rushing out the door, a huge grin on his face. He opened the back door and started unbuckling the little boy.

"How was he?" he asked, lifting the sleeping boy onto his shoulder.

"Great. It's so hard to believe he's _your_ son," Mike joked. "Definitely takes after Sara. He wouldn't stop talking. Mostly about you and Sam." He paused. "Speaking of which, how'd it go?"

"Mmm, a little troublesome at first. Dad, you sure you're okay with this?" Jack opened the front door and set J.J.'s bag down in the hallway. He laid him on the couch and covered him with a blanket.

"Of course, Jack. You guys need her and she needs you. Sara would want you to be happy. It's been four years.," Mike answered, sitting down in one of Jack's easy chairs.

"Thanks, cause, uh, she said 'yes'." Jack stayed sitting on the couch, rubbing J.J.'s back.

"Congratulations. J.J.'ll be ecstatic. Any idea on a date yet?" Mike stood up and walked into the kitchen. He returned carrying two bottles of beer. Handing one to Jack, he sat back down.

"We got some test results back yesterday. We've got about two months before she won't fit in that dress she's had her eye on for months." Jack's eyes shone bright with pure joy.

Mike was glad' it had been years since he had seen that look on the younger man's face. Maybe for those few months he had gotten Sara back, but those moments had been few and far between since Charlie's death.

Though Jack was his daughter's widower, he was like his own son to him. He was glad to see that Jack was moving forward with his life.

"Jack, you know you mean more to me than just Sara's husband, the father of my grandsons. You're like my own flesh and blood." Mike took a sip of his beer.

"But?"

"Hm, no but. I was just wondering if I could have the honor of not being known only as Charlie and J.J.'s grandfather." Mike kept his eyes lock on Jack, trying to gauge his reaction.

"Of course, it's the least we could do. The General already asked about J.J." Jack looked at his sleeping son, pride in his eyes.

"So, when's she due?" Mike sounded more like his buddy now, not just his former father-in-law.

"Janet said sometime around Christmas. God, Dad, I still don't know how we did this." Jack rubbed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. Mike could tell he was happy, maybe just a little confused.

"Jack, this is your third kid, I'm sure you know the facts of life by now," Mike joked.

Jack glanced back and grinned. "No, I mean, we've always been careful. None have ever broken, to my knowledge anyway. I even make sure I have condoms in my pack in case we're ever stuck… Oh, sorry, forgot who I was talkin' to." Jack looked a little embarrassed.

"What, because I'm Sara's father?"

"No, because what we do is classified." Jack was surprisingly comfortable talking to Mike like this. Just one more person who had to suffer because what he did was classified.

"You were going to say 'in case you were ever stuck off world,'" Mike said suddenly. He caught the shock fly across Jack's face.

"When I was brought on base that night Sara died, I could tell something wasn't right. There were lights flashing and alarms blaring as I stepped out of the elevator. Before the Airman could rush me back in, I heard the PA blare 'Unscheduled Off world Activation.' Jack, I can tell Sam doesn't work in Deep Space Radar Telemetry, for that matter neither do you. I know you're not allowed to talk about it, but I'm just letting you know I understand."

"Just don't let on that you know or Maybourne and the rest of the NID scum will be all over you." Jack stroked small circles on J.J.'s back as much in comfort to the small boy as to himself.

H relaxed significantly. In just a few months, six and a half according to Janet, they were going to have another child. He smiled as he contemplated that. They. Sam as already such a wonderful mother to J.J., and he wanted to make it official, not just because she was pregnant with his child, but because he loved her, deeply.

"I honestly still don't get it. I didn't want her to have to make this choice so early in our relationship. Career or family? I wanted her to have time to think about it. I wanted her to have a nice, long engagement, a perfectly planned wedding."

"Maybe there's a reason," Mike suggested. Jack shot him a look, completely indecipherable. It was somewhere between, "for cryin' out loud" and "do you really think so?" "It could have been fate's way of pushing you forth. What if something had happened while you were _just_ engaged? You guys have dangerous jobs. Besides, you have J.J., it was a career/family decision from the beginning."

Mike stood, clapping Jack on the shoulder. He paused to stare at his sleeping grandson, the only piece of Sara he had left.

"He's a great kid, Jack. He loves you both. You'll all do fine." With that, he left.

"I hope so," Jack muttered to the now empty room.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Jack, stop fidgeting!" Daniel clamped down on his friend's shoulders hard. He checked him over once more, making sure his dress blues were straight and clean.

They were in Jack's bedroom, getting ready, Sam having been forced to get dressed at her house then wait at Jack's neighbor's. Jacob Carter sat on the bed next to J.J., Mike on the other side of the boy.

"So, what do you think of all this hub-bub?" Jacob asked J.J., nudging the boy.

"My shoes pinch and my suit smells like fish!" J.J. wrinkled his nose. "Grampa Jake, can I tell you a secret?"

Jacob nodded, shooting Jack a confused look. Jack just shrugged back. J.J. motioned for Jacob and Mike to lean in.

"Sam looks beautiful today," he said with a smile.

"Shhh. Not too loud, want your Daddy to be surprised," Mike whispered back.

Teal'c stepped into the room and looked directly at Daniel. "Captain Jackson, Colonel O'Neill's presence has been requested to start the ceremony."

"Guess that's my cue." Jack quickly made his way to the backyard. He walked to the frond of the audience, signaling the start of the ceremony.

Daniel and Janet walked in first. Daniel winked at Jack as he let go of Janet and took his place by his side. Mike came in next with Sam's sister-in-law, followed by Teal'c and Sha'uri. J.J. walked carefully up the aisle, balancing the tiny pillow on his palms. Tay followed as the flower girl.

Finally, when Jack thought he could stand it no longer, he heard the preacher announce for everybody to stand. He intently watched down the aisle for Jacob and Sam.

He watched her approach through the back gate of the tall picket fence. Their eyes locked immediately onto one another, their joy shining through for all to see.

'You're beautiful,' Jack mouthed to her. She smiled and tilted her head downwards. He watched her trail her hand across her stomach as she neared him.

As Jacob handed her off to Jack, leaned forward. "I love ya, Jack, but if you ever hurt my Sammy…" Jack nodded quickly, letting Jacob know he knew he was serious. He took Sam's hand in his and stood in front of the preacher ready to begin.

_A/N: Okay so in the AU O'Malley's is a fancy restaraunt and all that. i took J.J.'s actions from my little bro Eric who tends to eat spaghetti just like that. And on that note, this is the end of the telling of the past, next part will go back to the present, and if ne body didn't notice, events took place earlier in their timeline than in the current one. thanks!_


	8. In the Wake of TMI

**In the Wake of TMI**

It was three hours after I had come through the gate to find myself in this other reality. It was odd the number of things that had been different, starting with Spacemonkey being in the military. That was just… _wrong_ on so many levels.

I can't really imagine Sara and I ever getting back together. I know it was my fault, but it's just not very plausible. It's hard to think Charlie might have had a little brother, too. This guy's gotta be made of tougher stuff than I am. I don't know if I could have handled it as well as he did. He seems to have everything under control though, so it must be pretty damn good. I can't imagine making it to General though.

Daniel's little family's surprising. It's hard to see him with one kid much less three. I feel bad for the kid, one daughter.

I was too busy trying to take it all in to notice _his_ Sam walk into the room. She sat down next to Jack silently, not wanting to disturb me I think.

"So, you've been married for ten years?" I asked when I saw her sitting there.

"Yeah," he answered shortly.

Sam's eyes lolled back and her head rested limply on Jack's shoulder. She paled immensely, shooting concern through Jack's eyes.

"Mom, you okay?" John asked, jumping to her side. I responded in the like.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," she shot back. Hmmm. Just like my Sam, never wanting anybody helping her out.

"Sam, honey, how long ago did it start?" Jack asked her. He obviously knew what was going on.

"Oh, I don't know, 3, 4 hours ago," she responded softly. I could see the shock on Jack and John's faces.

"John, go get Dr. Warner, quickly!" Jack stood carefully and helped her to stand. I jumped to the other side to help her out of the room. For the first time I realized why everyone was so concerned; she was obviously very pregnant. Well, Holy Crap!

"Jack, make sure I can get to the infirmary! I _DON'T_ want to have _this_ baby in the hall or on the elevator!" Sam screamed. I shot Jack a look, mostly wanting an explanation. He simply mouthed, 'later.'

"Yeasureyoubetcha," he smiled comfortingly at her.

Fortunately nothing had changed in the layout of the SGC. We got Sam to the infirmary no problem and John had helped Dr. Warner suit up. Jack and I laid her on the bed and I was quickly rushed out of the room.

I waited in the hall, pacing back and forth. I had to laugh suddenly. I was pacing like _I_ was the expectant father. Not that I hadn't thought about it thousands of times before. Sam was beautiful, _my_ Sam was beautiful, imaginative, smart, witty, and she always laughed at my jokes. Maybe not right away after that whole Laira thing and after my little Black Ops mission, but we had gotten that back.

"Must be a constant in every reality," I heard behind me. It was Daniel. I had hardly remembered he and Teal'c were there during the debriefing. They must have followed us down, along with Kowalski.

"What?" I pretended I didn't understand what he was talking about. He was military, he knew about the regs.

"Sam, you're thinking about her. Yours anyway. You've got the same look Jack gets. You guys together?"

"It's against the regs." It's the only answer I have anymore. I usually reserved it for when my Sam was around. It was sort of my way of letting her know I still cared after that whole Za'tarc, armband thing.

Kowalski threw me a concerned look.

"She's a Major. No, actually she's a Lt. Colonel, her promotion just came through yesterday. I just can't happen," I explained.

"Nice. Practice that often?" Daniel quipped.

"Oh yeah, way more than I'd like to."

Jack came out of the infirmary looking far more relaxed now. "She's resting for now. Warner says it'll probably be a few more hours. He's calling in Janet now."

I decided this was the perfect opportunity to turn the attention away from myself. The other guys were starting to make me nervous.

"So, obviously this is at least your second kid together," I said hoping he would expand on that. He did.

"Our sixth, including J.J. Sam adopted him when we got married," Jack answered happily. I wish I could be that happy.

"Holy Crap! What are you guys, Jack Rabbits?" They were laughing at my expense, seeing the shock on my face.

"No, nope, just Jack O'Neill," Daniel laughed.

"Obviously our worlds are quite different," Jack smiled.

"Okay, 'nother question. Where's General Hammond?"

"General O'Neill had taken over his position. The General retired after his heart attack last year," Teal'c suddenly spoke up.

"He just got overstressed with our four man team of Daniel, Teal'c, Kowalski, and me. I think Teal'c was the only one he could handle on a daily basis," Jack joked. "So, I explained all about us, tell us your story."

"I just have one more question first. The Tok'ra, where do you stand with them?" I didn't want to say too much in case the Tok'ra weren't exactly on their side. We'd been to one world where the Tok'ra had been the bad guys.

Jack looked up at me and slowly walked away. Something was bothering him. I just hoped it hadn't been something I'd said.

Daniel quickly filled me in. "When Sam's dad was dying of cancer the year before last, he agreed to take a symbiote. Unfortunately, neither General Carter, nor the Tok'ra symbiote survived."

"Wow." I leaned against the wall. Jacob dead? "Ours is still alive, but he's the only one I trust."

"We don't deal with the Tok'ra, _AT ALL_." Jack turned to face me, I could see the fury in his eyes. Well, it's good to see we both feel the same way about them. "They killed Jake, and Martouf tried to kill Sam." The rage was starting to build.

"That whole Za'tarc thing?" I asked. This had seemed pretty common, too.

Jack just looked confused. "No clue what you're talkin' 'bout. Sam crushed his mate after it squirmed outta some guy." He looked proud that she'd been able to accomplish so much. I had to laugh, but soon sobered thinking of my Sam's encounter with Jolinar.

"We weren't quite so lucky. Jolinar took over Sam." His face contorted in horror. I could tell it startled him, maybe just as much as the fury flying through my eyes.

"I had to shoot her with a Zat, but when the Ashrak tried to kill her, Jolinar gave up her life to save Sam. Marty was obsessed with her for a while, but when he was turned into a Za'tarc, Sam had to kill him. He was her friend, but I still hate the snakehead, for everything he put her through."

Jack could see it in my eyes, but I didn't try to hide. I couldn't, not from someone who was essentially myself. Yeah, so I love her. I have for years, it's not exactly new info. Not like there's anything we can do about it anyway.

"Okay, so what are some of the differences in our worlds?" Jack asked, obviously curious.

"Daniel's definitely not military," I said with a smile. "Sorry 'bout that Spacemonkey comment, our Daniel's a Geek." Daniel gave me an accepting nod.

"Kowalski, sorry man, but you're dead. Caught a Goa'uld, second mission, right after Sha're was taken as a possible host for Apophis' queen."

"Sha're became Amounet." I decided against telling them of the Harcesis. "She was killing the Space Monkey with one of those hand thingies. Teal'c had to shoot her. It's been years and Daniel's now engaged to Dr. Fraiser."

"What!" both Daniel and Kowalski shouted.

"_My_ Janet? That geek's with _my_ wife?" Kowalski shot a glare at their Daniel.

"First off, you died before she ever became part of the SGC, and secondly, it's not _his_ fault," I said pointing at their Daniel.

"Apophis was killed on Netu, but we're not even sure he's dead. He has a way of popping up at the most inopportune times."

"Oh, believe me, ours is definitely dead. These guys don't learn from each other's mistakes. Daniel took out Apophis just like we took out Ra." Jack gave me a crooked grin and I had to laugh. "Haven't had any Goa'uld troubles since. Of course, the Asgard tend to help us out from time to time."

"Gentlemen," I heard behind us. I turned around to see Janet approaching us.

"Dr. Kowalski, she's resting right now." Jack met her and immediately started fidgeting.

"Jack, she's early. I want to check and make sure she's alright." Janet started to push past him and I could see the concern in his eyes.

"Janet, please, she's _too_ early. I don't want Sara and J.J. all over again."

Janet rushed into the room, nodding in understanding. Jack just stood, unmoving. I walked over to him and clapped my hand on his shoulder. The pain he felt was more extreme than anything I'd ever experienced.

Losing Charlie was the worst thing I'd ever been through. My divorce from Sara hadn't been nearly so hard. We had drifted apart after Charlie's death, our divorce was inevitable.

It hurt, a lot. But this man, my counterpart, had lost Charlie, found Sara, lost her, and was now in threat of losing Sam and his child. _This_ Jack was more emotional than I, _he_ was allowed to be.

"Jack," I said softly. "How early is she?" I could remember bits and pieces from Charlie's birth still.

"About a month and a half. She's definitely going to deliver today. I've watched her four other times, this isn't any sort of false alarm." Jack slumped against the wall and sank to the floor. I didn't know how to respond so I just paced.

I wanted to know more about these people. They all seemed so happy. Daniel had Sha're with three children of his own. His oldest had an SG team of her own. Charlie and Janet had each other. Jack and Sam, six kids! I decided to find out all I could, hopefully to keep their minds away from any pessimistic thoughts I was sure were running through their heads.

"So, where's John?" I asked calmly.

"Assisting. He's _way_ smarter than we are. He's going to the Academy next year. Wants to be a medical doctor like Janet, a theoretical astrophysicist like Sam, and an officer like me." I could tell he was boasting. I'd probably, too.

"How old is he?" I knew he couldn't be more than sixteen. Entering the Academy at that age was amazing. The kid was built, too. He wasn't scrawny like most geeks. I cringed, I'd technically called my own son a geek.

"Fourteen. Birthday was last month. I take him out to see his moth… Sara every year. Sometimes he comes with me to see Charlie, too." I saw his eyes drop. I could tell John was one of the most important things in his life.

"You almost said, 'his mother.' Why didn't you?" I asked curiously.

"I loved Sara, and we had a wonderful marriage, but Sam has legally been his mother for over ten years. He called her 'Mom' before we were even married. Sam's essentially his mother," Jack answered. He stood and peeked into the small window in the infirmary door. When he turned around to face me again I figured he must have been checking on Sam.

"Wait, the kid's only fourteen?" I whistled. Impressive. Man, I wish I'd been that smart. He was willingly entering the Air Force, not exactly something I ever wanted one of my children doing, but with his paths I figured he wouldn't be seeing too much action.

"Yeah, I tell ya, he definitely doesn't get it from me. He graduated high school last year and with permission from the President, he'll be working here until he enrolls in the Academy. He wants to gain experience. He was the first person from Earth under the age of twenty to go through the 'Gate. That was five years ago. He went with Ta'ashra to visit Skaara and his family," Jack explained.

Man, these guys have had such a better life than us. John was amazing. I knew I'd been hanging around Sam and Janet too much when I found myself thinking like a scientist.

"Any clue if there's some outside force that makes him so smart?" It was definitely a Carter question.

"Never thought about it," Jack shrugged.

Now for the Fraiser questions. "Would you mind if I took a blood sample back with me? If I ever get back that is."

He just raised his eyebrow, looking for an explanation.

"It might have something to do with that bacteria thing. Either that or he's just naturally smart," I told him. Yep, definitely too much time with the docs. "Why doesn't that bacteria affect Sam and the babies?"

"It had something to do with Sara being pregnant when I transmitted it to her. Sam's had the bacteria since we first got together, so for some reason, it doesn't affect them. But sure, you can take some back with you." He just shrugged. "We've never really thought about it before. I'll have to make the suggestion to Janet as well." Jack looked through the door again.

"If she's anything like my Sam, she'll be fine," I said, hoping to calm him.

"Oh, I know. Doesn't stop me from worrying though." Jack gave a week smile. "She's stronger than she looks."

"Don't I know it. She's saved my ass more times than I can count. Which I suppose would mean more if I could count higher, but she's one hell of a lifesaver." I grinned thinking of her. She was so beautiful, so strong. God, it's only been a few hours, but I miss her. Yep, I've got it bad.

"Our youngest, Madison, was born on our way to the infirmary, that's why Sam flipped out earlier," he explained. I knew it had to be something like that.

Janet suddenly came bursting forth, knocking me with the door and sending me sprawling into Jack. "Dammit, Janet!" I shouted. Oops, I forgot where I was. That sure earned me a glare from every _single_ person in the hallway.

"Jack, it's time."

_A/N: Okay, i hope you've enjoyed a little bit into the current world of Jack. Next chapter will be "the find" thanks y'all!_


	9. The Find

**The Find**

"General Hammond, Sir! With all due respect, Colonel O'Neill did not get captured!" I practically shouted. Yeah, probably not the best way to get your CO's CO to authorize a rescue mission on a planet now deemed hostile, but Dammit! Oops I mean, Dang it, I was pissed.

"Major Carter! Stand down!" he growled back at me. Yeah, don't think I've ever sat faster. Ja… Colonel O'Neill must be rubbing off on me. Talking back to a superior officer, what was I thinking?

"If there are no Jaffa present when we send the MALP through, you may return to search for the Colonel." Hammond sat back and stared at me. Man, I wish I could figure that out. It was like he knew something I didn't.

"You're dismissed until 1400. I suggest you eat something and rest before we send the MALP."

I stood and quickly exited the room. I could feel Daniel and Teal'c staring after me, but I just wanted to be alone right now. I knew Daniel would try to follow me, but I also counted on Teal'c restraining him.

Eat? What was the General thinking? Of course I wouldn't eat. And rest? Totally out of the question. C'mon, they've got to know me better than that. Or maybe they do.

Yup, he must be thinking back to the last time Jack… ERGH! _Colonel O'Neill_ was left. Back on Edora with Laira. Yeah, that was years ago, but I know he still thinks of her. He won't admit it, but I know he slept with her. I _know_ he still wonders whether they've got a child or not.

If I had just hesitated all those years ago, I would have been trapped there with him. Who am I kidding? I'm sure he doesn't feel that way anymore.

I plopped myself down on the stool in my lab, knowing full well I wouldn't get any work done. Two hours, with nothing for me to do. Studying new technology usually helps, but not this time. I stood and went to the weight room for I nice, relaxing workout.

* * *

1400 hours, the MALP was going through. No shots fired, no bald heads or glowing eyes. We were mounting a rescue mission.

"SG-1, you have a go. SG-2 will be accompanying you," Hammond ordered. I grinned a little trying not to show exactly how ecstatic I truly was. Had to look professional, you know?

* * *

When we stepped to the other side, I knew immediately what must have happened. We followed the Colonel's foot prints straight to where they were backing into the side of a cliff.

"Daniel, you and Teal'c check around, make sure he's not lying injured somewhere in hiding," I ordered. I knew it was useless, we wouldn't find anything.

I set to inspecting the cliff face. It had to be here somewhere. There was no explanation. Ja… _Colonel O'Neill_, couldn't just disappear with out a trace.

I've got to stop doing that. He's the Colonel. My CO. The man in charge. The commander who always listens to me even when he's got no clue what I'm talking about. My friend. No, my best friend.

But he was more than just that. God, I miss him. Those deep chocolate eyes, that wonderful silver hair. That smile that went missing for months after Edora, but came back when we worked things out. The way he always pretends he doesn't understand me.

Ha! I found it! "Daniel! Teal'c! Over here!" I pressed the rock face and watched a section of it flicker.

"A quantum mirror! That's where he went," Daniel exclaimed. I could hear the joy in his voice.

"Teal'c, go let Hammond know we may have found the Colonel." I inspected the surrounding area to make sure there was no damage done and we could return home.

Teal'c came running back and stood beside us.

"Okay, let's go bring him home."

* * *

We stepped through the 'Gate to hear Jack shouting. I couldn't tell if it was our Jack or not, so I laid my weapon on the ground. Daniel and Teal'c followed suit.

"Close the Iris!" I shouted up to them. I saw Jack disappear from the control room. I knew he was heading down to see us, but I still wasn't sure if he was ours or not. I'd seen a few of them with the scar through the left eyebrow, but the eyes were always different. I could always tell who was _my_ Colonel. My Colonel? Where'd that come from?

I didn't even get the chance to look into his eyes before he grabbed me tightly in the biggest bear hug I'd ever seen, much less been a part of. I hesitantly brought my arms around him, still not quite sure what was going on.

He rubbed his hand over the back of my head, entwining his fingers in my hair. I'd never seen him act like this before, and it almost scared me. This emotional… bombshell he was putting me through was definitely not being left in _that_ room.

"Oh, God, Sam," I heard him whisper into my ear. He said it! I wasn't Major Carter, or Major, or just Carter. I was Sam, finally.

"They've never come across the mirrors. I though I'd never see you again," he whispered again. I held him tighter, knowing only Daniel and Teal'c would see; we had left SG-2 standing guard on the other side of the mirror.

"Sir, are you okay?" I asked backing away.

"No, but I'm not injured," he answered quietly. He stepped back and rested his left arm across my shoulders, wrapping his left hand around my arm. "C'mon, there's a little excitement going on right now."

I just stared at him, full of disbelief. My CO had his arm around me while we were on duty!

"Um, Sir? You might have gotten lost and all, but the three of us are still on duty here. SG-2 is waiting for us," I told him trying to hid the smile threatening to play across my face.

"Well, radio them, let 'em know you found me and let's go!" he urged. This was so not like him.

"Teal'c-"

"I shall return MajorCarter," he interrupted me.

"Maybe I should go with him," Daniel suggested.

"Stay within radio contact," I told them. Yeah they knew the drill, we'd worked together for years, but, hey, a little reminder never hurt.

I watched as Lt. Simmons dial the 'Gate for them. As he waved down to us, I noticed a wedding ring on his left hand. God, I hope it isn't me!

"Don't worry," Jack whispered. He nodded up at Simmons, following my gaze. He placed his hand on the small of my back, sending shivers straight up my spine.

He slowly led me to the infirmary, not speaking a word. I didn't know what to do. This was so much closer than we'd ever gotten before. I could smell his cologne wafting in my direction. It mingled softly with his aftershave and deodorant. Normally he wouldn't be wearing anything with a scent, but originally we weren't supposed to go off world today.

It had been hours since we'd seen him, with the original mission starting at 0900, but he still smelled so wonderful. Oh, why must he do this to me!

I smiled up at him, noticing we had reached our destination, and his eyes sparkled back down at me. I looked around to see the other Daniel and Teal'c, plus a very much alive Kowalski.

"Teal'c, what's with the hair?" Wow, and no gold either.

"Major Jackson, I thought hair was a natural occurrence for the residents of this planet," he stated calmly.

"Ours doesn't have hair," Jack answered, smiling. "And he's still got the tattoo."

Teal'c raised his eyebrow slightly, just enough for me to notice. I grinned towards him, he was so much like ours, but he seemed so old, experienced.

Suddenly, I snapped my head in Daniel's direction. "_Major_ Jackson? Wow, maybe you can show Danny-boy a thing or two." Definitely spending too much time with Jack. "You don't have his… hmmm… you don't overdose on gravity quite so much, do you?" I joked with him, hoping he would see it as such.

"Danny-boy?" He shook his head. "Space Monkey? How does he put up with you guys? Maybe I should have a talk with him." He turned on his heals and walked away. My jaw dropped straight to the floor.

I could hear Kowalski chuckling behind us, sending a wave of relief over my body. I watched Daniel walk back towards the Gateroom, obviously checking to see if he could find his counterpart.

"So, uh, what's going on?" I asked. The curiosity was starting to drive me nuts. There really wasn't much of a reason for us to be in the infirmary unless the Colonel was suffering from entropic cascade failure. He'd been here a whole lot longer than we had, but he wasn't showing any symptoms.

"I know how much you love talking to the other you's every time this 'thing' happens, but as she is so indisposed for the next few days, I figured I'd give you the next best thing." I glanced up at him, making sure he could see my confusion. What in the world was he talking about? He couldn't have gotten _their_ McKay, he would never subject me to that torment.

I could tell I had show my fear on my face because Jack started laughing at me.

"Don't worry, he bugs the Hell outta me, too. No, I think you'll like this kid."

I raised my eyebrow at him, nudging his arm playfully. "Kid?" I asked. Well, hey, maybe it's Hailey. She _was_ far smarter than I, and Jack had liked her as soon as he'd seen her in action.

"He's assisting in the infirmary at the moment, but according to Kowalski over there, he should be out soon." Jack pointed his thumb over at Kowalski who had positioned himself against the wall. He just shrugged back.

"Okay, so whatever's going on in there has obviously happened before, but why does it effect us?" I didn't mind this universe, but I was getting fed up with everybody running in circles around the issue. It was already 1625, I was getting sort of tired.

"Five times," Kowalski spoke up. It was the first time I'd heard him since I'd gotten there.

"Okay?" I asked, motioning for him to elaborate.

"This is Jack and Sam's fifth kid. Always quick, too." His eyes fell. I could tell he wasn't quite comfortable talking about it, suddenly.

"What's wrong?" I turned to Jack for clarification.

"Dr. O'Neill's baby is arriving about a month and a half early. Jack's son will be out to talk to you soon," he explained to me.

Dr. O'Neill? Yep, we're married in this one, too. All these Sam's, these other me's running around, they all got to have _him_. Thirteen Sam's now, who were married to him, or engaged to him. Three Jack's were dead, but they had still been together. There were even two universes where the President had given permission for the SGC to ignore certain "regulations" allowing us to be together.

"How much experience does Charlie-"

"John."

"Does _John_ have dealing with the Stargate?" I asked. He couldn't be that old, why would Jack want me working with him. From what Jack had told me of his own life, Charlie could only be 16, so any other children would have to be pretty young.

"First kid born on Earth to go through the 'Gate. He's been working with Sam for years on it. Their timeline runs a little differently than ours. Charlie would be 27 if he were still alive. Jonathan is 14, Sara is 10, Jacob is 7, Catherine is 4 and Madison is 2 ½. John spends a lot of time working here on the Stargate and in the infirmary."

I leaned against Jack, subconsciously, and grabbed his arm to steady myself. Only 14? And I was gonna work with him? And he's in the infirmary helping his mother give birth? This was the most interesting universe so far. It was odd, for the first time I noticed the relaxed atmosphere of the base.

"Sir, you've been here for hours, could you fill me in on this place?"

_A/N: Okay, I'm soooooooo sorry this one took so long to get up, but i've been REALLY busy. I'll try to get the next one up sooner for ya! thanks y'all!_


	10. Going Home

_A/N: Okay, so so so sorry this took so long, i feel terrible about it. i hope you like it, but it's a little short, sorry._**  
**

**Going Home**

23:33, nine and a half hours after they sent the MALP through the wormhole, we were going home. I don't mind this place so much, a little on the quiet side, but the Goa'uld are pretty much defeated here. My counterpart has a family, a wonderful one at that.

My life's the military, the Stargate program. I don't think I could ever hold down a desk, or just sit in charge of the program itself. I'm a man of action, but this universe has shown me how wonderful life could be.

And now we have to go home.

I had to let go of Sam… er, Carter. Had to stop showing her how I feel. Return to being her commanding officer. The asshole I normally am.

Damn, this sucks!

Lt. Simmons locked in the seventh chevron and the familiar Kawoosh! could be heard over anything else. I stood there, facing the event horizon. Knowing it was sending us home made me reluctant to step forward.

I turned and faced the rest of the Gateroom. The O'Neills, minus Sam, were all standing there, watching us. I had gotten to know them all since I'd shown up here. I thought the were up a little late when I remembered they were four hours behind us. Well, actually twenty hours ahead of us.

Carter and John had been working on the reason why we weren't suffering that whole distortion thing. It was the main reason we tried staying in these alternate universes as short as possible. Never once the whole 14 hours _I_ had been here did I feel like I was being pulled in a thousand different directions.

They still hadn't quite figured it out, but I was ordering us home. Carter was showing serious signs of fatigue. She'd been doing a lot of naquada and naquadria testing over the past month and I know she wasn't sleeping. I want her to rest. Daniel had informed me on oh so many occasions that I was pushing her too hard. Why can't they see it's my way of showing her how much I trust her and believe in what she does. Even if she never accomplished anything she had been striving after, I'd still be there for her and believe in her.

The Daniel's had spent the entire 9 hours talking about the cultural differences and similarities between the two universes. Space Monkey had even cornered Major Jackson and badgered him about his reasoning behind joining the military. That had been a wonderful philosophical debate to walk in on. I could only take it for about 30 seconds.

Thankfully, Jack had decided to relieve the kids' grandfather, Mike, and brought them to the base to meet their new little brother. Fortunately for me, Mike couldn't come onto the base.

When Sara and I had divorced, Mike and I had sort of, fallen apart, I guess. To put it nicely, I'm _still_ scared about the future of my career. In this universe, he had a civil relationship with Jack and his second family. It nearly floored me when I heard that Jack and Sam's kids called him "Grandpa" along with John.

After the kids were done saying hi, I took them to the commissary to get them out of everybody's hair. The cook had made just about every type of Jell-o possible, knowing the O'Neill's would be in. I knew having the children on base would allow Jack and Sam some time with their new son without worrying or having to check in with anybody.

Kate and Maddi had decided they weren't going to let "Uncle John" go no matter what. Well, unless Daddy called. Sara hadn't been asking too many questions or really saying too much. She excused herself once she was done with her Jell-o, saying she was running to her mother's lab and would return shortly.

John had stopped in to check up on us and sat down next to me. "What's up with Sara? Does she not like me or something?"

"Mmm, no. She's always like this on base. Mom can't figure it out. She just draws. She'll come back with a roll of paper and any sort of drawing utensils she can find. Sometimes she's real calm and draws just pictures. Other times she gets real worked up and her mind starts over working. When she was six she drew out the plans to a new Naquada reactor that didn't have the same flaws we were trying to work out." He took a huge bite of red Jell-o and smiled.

"Wow, wish I was as smart as all you guys," I joked. It was so easy and yet so hard to talk to this kid. He was smart and mature, it was just like talking to another member of the SGC. He was smart like Janet and Sam, but he had my military bravado.

"Eh, you are, but if your Sam is anything like my mom, and if you're anything like my dad, just keep playing dumb." He grinned at me over his bowl and continued eating. I shifted uncomfortably under the napping Kate and Maddi.

"Dad loves listening to Mom and he always remembers what she says. Mom loves explaining things t him because it keeps them in the same room longer."

Sara came back through the door with her arms laden with everything she needed. I noticed she pushed most of the tables and chairs out of the way and settled herself on the floor.

John looked over at Jake who had started turning around in his chair.

"Leave her alone, Jake," he scolded sternly. I could hear myself in his voice. Jake lowered his eyes and turned back around.

"Here, maybe you could get some use out of this." I pulled my yo-yo out of my pocket and handed it to him. I watched his eyes light up as he stood on the chair so it wouldn't touch the floor.

"That's Charlie's yo-yo," John said softly, leaning into me, looking straight into my eyes. "Nobody touches it."

"I've only had Charlie, and Sara and I got divorced shortly there-after. I figure, seeing Jake happy, well all of you happy, is the closest to happy I'll ever be. It'll keep him happy for a few hours at least." I hugged the little girls on my lap tightly. "What I wouldn't give to have this again."

"Don't sell yourself short." John stood and picked up his bowl. "I think somone's got something for you." He nodded towards where Sara was sitting.

I turned my head to see Sara approaching me with a section of paper rolled up in her hands. She held it out for me to take so I motioned with my head for her to put it on the table.

"So, what have we got here?" I asked her. She quietly unrolled the paper on the table in front of me.

"This is so you can come back and visit us again," she whispered, and promptly waked away from me, leaving me dumbstruck. I tell ya, not many women can do that.

I looked up at the paper and groaned. I'd been hoping that maybe she had been in a "Just Drawing" mood, but that just wasn't the case. It was a schematic for something. I'm usually pretty good with electronics, I mean like my stereo equipment 'n' stuff, but this was definitely beyond me. It looked just as foreign as some of the stuff I'd come up with during my time as an Ancient database.

I felt a hand touching my shoulder, I knew that grip.

"Eh, don't worry, she does stuff like that to all of us," Jack told me. He looked down at his sleeping daughters in my lap. I could see what he was feeling through his eyes.

"They're great kids, Jack," I said as he took Kate from my lap. As I stood with Maddi in my arms I couldn't help but think about how relaxed I felt here, in this universe. Every piece of my personality felt different.

"Yeah, I know."

I followed Jack to the section of the base designated for Officer's quarters. He had told me of the rooms built for himself and J.J., so I figured that was where we were headed.

He carefully opened the door to his quarters and led me back to a small room that held a crib, two twin beds and a cot. He motioned for me to lay Maddi on one of the twin beds.

We covered the girls and snuck out of the room. He gently closed the door as we slipped into the hall and wandered back to the commissary in silence.

"So," Jack spoke up. "I guess you guys are leaving in a few hours?"

"Yep. Whether Carter figures it out or not, we have to get back. Wish we could stay longer, but don't see how that's possible," I said sitting down with my cup of coffee.

"Never imagined there'd be other universes out there. It's kinda creepy if you ask me."

"Well, just don't try to explore them, there's a few that are just far too dangerous."

So, here we are, standing in front of the Gate, ready to go home, and all I wanna do is stay. I mean, they have no conflict with the Goa'uld, all their families are still intact, for the most part, and I'm technically not under the watchful eye of the Good Ol'e USAF.

I turned to glance back at Jack's happy family. It's not fair. All these other Jacks get to have her. Damn! I hate the regs. I'm willing to break them, but I'm not willing for her to give up her career for me. This means too much to her.

I watched as Janet rolled his Sam into the Gateroom. Jack rested his newborn son in her arms and approached me.

"Here, this is from all of us," he said, handing me a small white envelope. He patted me on the shoulder and walked back to his family.

I tucked the envelope into the breast pocket of my jacket, patting it gently. I looked up at my team. Daniel's facing the Gate, fidgeting from foot to foot. Teal'c's staring forward, waiting for me to issue the order. Sam… er… Carter walks up and stands next to me. I noticed she had Sara's diagram tucked into her pack.

"All right, Campers, let's go home."

_A/N: Okay, so how'd you like it? Next ch. ATTACK will hopefully get done sooner. after that each ch. will be a viewpoint from jack and sam, maybe some daniel and teal'c. please review! oh yeah, and i know i probably changed tenses a bit, i tended to forget what i was writing in. sorry if it gets confusing i didn't mean to._


	11. Attack!

_A/N: Okay i'm sorry it's been so long since i've posted, and there's just no excuse. this is short but i had to post it._**  
**

**Attack!**

Pt. I

"Daniel! Get down!" I shouted as Daniel obliviously stepped out of the side of the cliff. He quickly ducked down behind Teal'c and readied his sidearm. A few years ago I would have never thought he could get ready that quickly. He woulda just stood there like a gaping idiot.

Teal'c was holding off a small contingent of Jaffa, rapidly firing his staff weapon, and took out five walking incubators at once. Pretty impressive I'd say.

"Teal'c, you and I are going to provide cover fire. Daniel, Carter, get to the DHD, now!" I slid amongst the rocks and trees to provide better cover for my people. There was no way I was gonna let any of them go down.

Carter and Daniel slid their way up to the DHD as quickly as they could, ducking the orange charges from the staff weapons set off their way. Carter stood behind the Space Monkey, sending off round after round into the advancing Jaffa as Daniel dialed Earth.

As the last chevron locked, yes Sam I know what they're called, she hopped on the radio. "Sir, let's go!" I could hear how frantic she was as she shouted down into her shoulder. I knew she was keeping her cool and I had no reason to worry, but I did, and not from a military standpoint. I watched her punch in our IDC into the GDO and I could tell she was searching for us.

I sent Teal'c out to the gate first. Carter couldn't continue to cover Daniel by herself. I watched as he pushed Daniel through as I moved to new cover. Teal'c and I took out another three Jaffa. He reached over to grab her arm, but she whipped her head around. A heated discussion started on her end, but I couldn't hear what was being said.

Teal'c raised his eyebrow, but didn't reply. He faced the oncoming Jaffa and fired as he stepped through the Gate.

Good, it was just Carter and I left. I knew she was fully capable of taking care of herself, but judging by the look on the Jaffa, they weren't out to kill. I had to get her through the Gate. She was our most valuable team member and if she got captured we'd all be sunk.

Dammit! I was out of hiding places. I'd have to make a run for it.

I bolted, firing at anything that moved. I could see the Jaffa falling around me and smiled, knowing I wasn't taking them out on my own.

"AGH!" Was that really me? The scream was torn from my throat as the staff blast ripped through my shoulder. The sheer force from the blast pushed me to the ground, forcing my face into the dirt. I could have probably caught myself had I not had one arm searing in pain and the other hand clutching my P-90.

Pushing myself to my knees, I fired at the first Jaffa I saw and continued my run to the Gate. My eyes flashed white as I stumbled up the stone steps, blinding my view of Carter and the Gate. The next shot sent me flying into Carter. She clutched my vest and pulled me through the puddle just as the cold darkness enveloped my mind.

* * *

Pt. II 

"Close the iris!" I could just barely hear General Hammond shouting as Ja… Colonel O'Neill and I hit the ramp. I watched his face slam into the metal grating, peeling down the skin from his left temple to his jaw line. I winced as the blood came pooling out.

"Medic!" I screamed, my brain finally taking over. The Colonel's body was hardly recognizable, his left leg twisted up so his foot was turned towards his head. I could see his pants steadily turning a deep shade of red. The wounds from the staff weapon were cauterized shut, but still smoking.

I didn't dare move, the Colonel and I were tangled precariously together. If I moved there was a chance I could hurt him more, so I just sat there, cradling him gently.

Janet arrived quickly, taking Colonel O'Neill out of my arms. Her team carefully loaded him onto the gurney as she turned her attention to me. She checked my pupils and tried asking me questions about what was going on. I wasn't answering.

I felt her heft me up and drag me to the infirmary.

_A/N: Okay sorry it's so short again, but the next part didn't have anything to do with the attack at all so i decided to make that the next chap. thanks again for the few reviews i've received for this story, i know it sux but it still makes me feel better._


	12. Coma

**Coma **

**Part I **

Darkness. It's the strangest feeling. I couldn't see anything, couldn't move. There was just… nothingness. So this is what death's like? Poor Charlie. Being so young this would have surely scared him to… Okay that's just not funny, even for me.

"Sam," I could hear someone saying. It was Doc, so far away.

Wait! Voices? I could hear them, what they were saying. I can't be dead, not like this. I tried moving again, but to no avail. My eyes wouldn't even open.

'Help! I'm here! Just talk to me!' I couldn't shout at them, no matter how hard I tried.

"Sam, I need to talk to you," I heard Janet say.

I felt my hand move and, suddenly, it felt cold and empty. She'd been holding it?

"Sam, he slipped into a coma early this morning. It's now turned into a waiting game, but when he does eventually wake up, he's gonna be one crappy hamper. That knee is shot, Sam. It's going to take a miracle for him to ever walk on it again."

What! Oh, no! I don't think so! I'm getting up now!

But the attempt was futile. My body wasn't accepting my commands anymore.

I heard the infirmary door open and could tell by the footsteps that Daniel and Teal'c had entered. Soft murmuring was all that was carried my way. They spoke almost as if they could tell I could hear them.

I could feel it when they approached the bed and could feel a hand touch my arm. Too small to be Teal'c but too rough to be Sam, I knew Daniel was going to say something. I could tell by his movements he was trying to figure out what it was. Yep, I knew the Space Monkey well.

"Hey… Jack… Look, we're getting a little bored here, so come on back. Nobody's bringing back any rocks for me to study."

He lifted his hand and I could tell he had moved away. Teal'c was next to speak.

"Get well soon, O'Neill." Short, sweet, and to the point. Yep, that's Teal'c.

I heard Daniel and Teal'c leave the room and someone else walk away. It had to have been Sam, she hadn't said anything.

I could still feel a presence in the room and soon heard a chair pushed up to my bedside. If I could have winced at the sound, I would have. The curtain was pulled around to give _us_ some privacy, I assumed.

"Hey, um, Jack." It _was_ Sam. Wait, and she finally called me Jack! "Janet says there's no proof, but always the possibility that you can hear us. I just wanted you to know that we're here for you… I'm here for you. Please wake up."

She sat there for what seemed like hours, not doing a thing. I could feel her staring at me, it was the weirdest feeling.

Suddenly, her warm fingers slid into mine, gripping them gently. It was a touch I'd only wished in my dreams to give her. The fingers of her other hand slid casually up and down my arm.

"Jack, there were some things going on, between us, on that last mission that I think we need to talk about. Don't worry, if you could see me, I'm slightly smiling. Not much to smile about, though, with you lying here now."

Oh, Sam. There's plenty to smile about. You're alive and uninjured.

"I'm not leaving you. Well, I can't. I'm not allowed to leave the infirmary yet. I will say, though, that I'm glad you chose to use me as your landing pad after our flight through the Gate. My shoulder's messed up pretty good, but Janet said if I hadn't been there, you most likely wouldn't be alive right now."

Okay, so maybe I was wrong, but I was so glad she was going to at least be okay, and here with me. I wanted to hold her tightly, make all her pain go away, but I couldn't. I couldn't even squeeze her hand back.

"Janet found the envelope in your pocket and asked what it's about. I won't tell her. Nobody will open it, that's yours. I think I have a clue, though, because Sam O'Neill gave me one, too."

Next thing I knew, her head was rested on my chest and I could smell her shampoo wafting into my nostrils. It put me to sleep. Well, my coma form of sleep.

**

* * *

**

Part II

I left the infirmary reluctantly. It had been over two weeks and there was still no change in Jack's condition. (I gave up on calling him the Colonel long ago.) His knee was slowly healing, but wouldn't get any stronger unless he could exercise, though the infirmary staff was doing all they could. I hadn't left his side. I'd promised him I wouldn't.

Janet had finally released me, and unfortunately, forced me to go home. I leaned down over Jack and kissed his forehead.

"I have to leave for the night, Doc's orders. Don't go waking up without me." I wanted to be the first person he saw when he opened his eyes and I couldn't bare to think about missing it.

I squeezed his hand and left the room.

The drive home was dull and uneventful. I turned the radio up, noticing it was a CD Cassie had left in there on accident when I'd taken her to the airport before our last mission. The song gave me an idea. Jack had to be brought out of it somehow.

I pulled into my driveway and grabbed the CD. Running into the house, I threw my keys on the table, ignoring the mail, before heading upstairs to my office.

I disappeared in front of my computer for hours. When I was finally finished, I ate just enough to put me to sleep. I didn't want to, but knew Janet would rip me a new one if I pulled and Edora stunt, as we'd come to call it, again.

I wanted to hurry and get back to Jack and the SGC, but I slept through the entire next day. The rest was unfortunately not very helpful. I woke up feeling more tired than when I'd first laid down.

I rushed through my morning routine, grabbed my home project and jumped in the car. I don't think I'd ever driven to the SGC so fast in my life. Today was the day. Jack O'Neill was going to wake up.

_A/N: So, it didn't take as long as last time, but it's not that long either, sorry. total cliff hanger and that wasn't intentional. i was going to make it longer but i realized that i lost the written page somewhere, so ihave to work on that before you get the next part. i hope you like it and i want lots of reviews this time! lol i didn't want to put who was speaking in the parts so if that bothers ne body, let me know and i'll fix it. any guesses what's in the envelope?_


	13. Waking Up

_A/N: Sorry bout the wait, i'll fill you in at the end of this chap!_

**Waking Up**

**Part I**

Sam said she would be back soon. That was two days ago. Daniel and Teal'c had been by, General Hammond, too, but it didn't really help. Not that I didn't like them coming around, but they weren't Sam, my Major.

I miss her voice, her smell, her touch. What if Janet was wrong? What if… it wasn't really a coma? What if it was some sort of perverted, subconscious way to stay close to her?

Well, if that was the case, I should have woken up already. Dr. Napoleon said my knee is done for, I won't be going through the Gate anytime, well, most likely ever. I'm not in her chain of command anymore.

Why can't I wake up! I want to see her! Those beautiful blue eyes, that smile she saves just for me, the emotion playing on her face she thought she was hiding so well. I have to see her again.

I could hear someone approaching and by the sound of it, it was either Sam or Janet.

"Sam? Did you have a nice rest?" Yes! It was Sam! Finally!

"Not really, but I did sleep through the day."

"What have you got there?"

"I'm just going to sit here and do a little work. Would you mind if I played a little music?"

"No, go ahead."

I could hear Sam getting settled next to me. As much as I want to see her, I would much rather she was doing something productive instead of hanging around me. I mean, I'm not worth her time.

"Good morning, Jack." I could hear the smile in her voice. Ho, man, I wish I could smile back, just to see her eyes light up.

She gasped. Oh, shit, what happened now?

"Jack? Jack!" She started rubbing my cheek with her thumbs. I could feel the softness of her fingers.

"Sam, what's wrong?"

"I swear I just saw him smile." I did?

"Sam, I'm sorry, but I wouldn't get my hopes up if I were you."

"Yeah, I know."

She moved away from me and sat back down, I could hear her slump into the chair. She shifted a little and I could feel her getting close again, obviously the Doc had left.

"Listen, Jack." She chuckled at her own joke. "Sorry, no pun intended. Anyway, I wanted to tell you that I haven't opened my envelope. I want to wait until you wake up. Also, this is sorta hard for me to say. I feel like I'm taking the coward's way out since I don't even know if you can hear me or not." She hesitated and I could tell she was thinking. Not like she ever stops. I think I'd be truly scared we ended up in the wrong reality if she did. "Jack, I love you. I'm finally allowed to say it, due to, well, your unfortunate predicament."

If my heart could race it would have. Wait, I think I can hear the beep of the monitor speeding up. Sam's actually telling me she reciprocates the feelings I've had since I met her, and I can't say a damn thing back! She's the one who wanted it kept in that room! Something wet just dripped on my hand.

"Oh, Jack, I'm sorry. Now I'm crying all over you. I really should try to get some work done. I uh, made a little something for you when I got home the other night."

Most people would think this was so unlike my Major, but I've known her long enough to know that there's a woman under that tough soldier routine. Nobody thinks I notice her moods or the way she tries to prove just how tough she is, but I do. I've respected her as an officer since our first mission, but I've also been allowed to see her as she is. Like when we thought Daniel had died in our first year. I know she'd been trying to prove she was tough, but I wanted her to know that I understood if she needed to cry. I've never looked down on her for it.

I heard and felt her slink back and music filled the air. The first song was Beethoven's Fur Elise. It was quite calming. Ah, classical, truest form of music there is. It was very relaxing. Oh, I guess she knows me a little too well. Opera.

When we first realized we were a team, in it for the long haul, we had a team night, my house, to get to know each other. Daniel and I were pretty good, but we wanted Carter to know we trusted her. She was surprised when she saw the classical music and operas I had in my CD tower.

About halfway through that CD, it stopped and I felt her sit on the edge of the bed, her breath brushing by my forehead as she whispered, "Please, Jack, come home." I felt her back of, probably to get back to work and the music started again.

That did it, I had to wake up, now! It's so hard to move. I tried to raise my hand to her in comfort. I could tell she was crying again and it broke my heart. I just have to reach her!

Wait! She didn't back off all the way. There was still a weight on the edge of my bed.

I want to touch her so badly. If I could just move my hand over a little bit. Eh, what's the use? My body's not responding to anything I tell it, so why even bother.

No, there it was! Pressure on my fingers. I could feel. Nah, she must have just moved her hand over. But under mine?

"Janet!" Damn that woman can be loud when she wants to! I can't help but mentally wince at her shriek.

"What is it?" Those little heels came clicking and I could hear her checking my pulse and other vitals. That stethoscope was cold!

"Sam, he just shivered. What happened?"

"I was sitting on the chair, leaning on the edge of the bed. His hand moved over and covered mine. When I called for you, he winced."

"His brain waves have shown an increase in activity."

Yes, yes. C'mon eyes, open Dammit! I wanted to say something back to them. To let them know I was here. Maybe I can! No, something's choking me.

"He's trying to breathe on his own. Nurse!" Someone else came running into the room. "Help me remove the respirator!"

"Janet, he's not even awake yet!"

"I know, which means he doesn't know any better. He's just going to fight it. He could end up choking himself."

A huge pressure was lifted off my throat and chest. I coughed heavily, feeling nothing blocking my airway anymore.

I tried squeezing my hands into fists to see if I really had control over my body, or if I was just imagining things. I felt my fingertips touch the palms of my hands.

Okay, time to test the eyelids.

I blinked them open, _very_ slowly. Doc was looking down at me, her evil pen light ready to check my pupils. For once, I didn't struggle. The sooner she was done, the sooner I'd be alone with Sam.

"Gener – ah, Colonel, I'm going to check your vitals and let you rest before I run my full barrage of tests."

I tried to nod in response but only managed to throw myself into extreme pain. I quickly discovered I could only open one eye completely. What the Hell had happened to me? I could feel the bandages on my face. I didn't get shot there, too, did I?

The doc finished up and flashed a sad smile at Sam and me. I reached up and took Carter's hand in mine.

"Hey," I just barely managed to squeak out. Okay, I have to do this before I lose my cool. Never mind, I've already lost it with that little squeak, but I have to let her know I could hear her.

"I," I coughed deeply, still feeling like there was something lodged in my throat. "I love you, too… Sam," I whispered. I just have to smile at the shock in her eyes.

"You could hear me?" Okay, ow, my hand's not a stress ball.

I nodded slightly. "And I don't think you're a coward either. You're one of the best soldiers I've ever served with." Man, who knew talking could be so tiresome.

"Get some rest, Jack. We'll talk again when you wake up."

I couldn't argue with that, I was already falling asleep on her.

**Part II**

Oh… My… GOD! He could hear me! The entire time! I don't know whether I should be mortified or elated. I mean, he knows what I said, and he told me he loved me too, but what if it's just hospital talk. You know, when people are doped up and don't know what they're saying? I have to inform the General he's awake.

I found Janet already there, giving Hammond her report.

"He's sleeping," I said, walking into the briefing room. "He, uh, could hear everything we said around him. I don't know when it started, though."

"So, we have no clue how much he knows about his condition," Hammond replied, looking between Janet and myself.

"No, Sir," Janet answered when she saw my eyes drop.

"How should we tell him, then, medically speaking?" he asked her. I had never thought of that. I was so happy that he was awake, I hadn't thought of how he would react to the thought that he wouldn't be going through the Gate anymore. Personally, I thought letting him know his career was over just as he reached Brigadier General wasn't really a smart move, but, Hey, I just know Astrophysics.

"I think we'll let him run the course of the conversation. He's going to want to know the extent of the damage and I accidentally started to call him General."

Hammond nodded. "Keep me posted on his condition."

Janet and I left the briefing room and headed towards the commissary. Coffee. We need coffee.

"Janet," I started once we had sat down. "Let me tell him, please." I figured he would take it a little easier coming from me.

"I'll cover any medical questions he has. Other than that, I'll leave it to you."

_A/N: Okay, so my laptop is totally fried at the moment. Some wires got crossed in the power adapter and sparks were literally flying everywhere. I can't actually retrieve anything else i've written off of my laptop until we can figure out if it actually fried the hard drive or if the battery just ran out, so i have to work on the computers i find when i come across them. the only reason you're even getting this chapter is because my best friend and her parents are in the City for Thanksgiving, so i get the computer all to myself, for now. _

_oh, and you know what else i just found out? They totally jipped us on the Season Eight DVD's. i haven't actually gotten around to watching all of them and i just was finally able to get onto Gatworld, so if you already know this, i'm sorry i'm just ranting. Threads was cut down from a 90 min. episode for sindication, but they also did it on the DVD! it's a DVD for cryin' out loud, ( i actually picked that phrase up from my GGma), i mean why couldn't they put the WHOLE episode on the disc! GRRRRR! sorry it just torques my noodle!_

_okay happy thanksgiving to all who celebrate it here in the US, and have a wonderful day to everyone else! thanks for reading and please leave a review. sorry if some of it seems out of character, but it's just the way i imagined them after so long w/ Jack in a coma. _

_oh yes, and tell me if you want to know what was left for Sam and Jack in those envelopes. i originally didn't put it in the story, i don't know why, but now i'm thinking i might add it. let me know what you think!_


	14. Clearing up a Few Things

**Clearing up a Few Things  
**

**Part I**

Wait! Did she call me General? No, she called me Gener. Good start on the way to general. Yeah, we came through to the wrong reality here. Something's definitely not right!

"Jack, whoa, be careful there!" Crap! It's Danny boy.

"What's going on around here?" I know it's a little harsh, but Dammit, I want answers and I want them now!

"I'll… go get Sam and Janet." He left just as quickly as my eyes had opened. He's definitely nervous, and I'm pretty sure I know why, but I mean, c'mon.

Why is everybody acting so strange? They all seem jumpy around me. I mean, I know I'm not the best patient and all, but man. Right now I'm to tired to give them the run around.

That's it! They don't know I heard them. Sam and Janet haven't returned from their meeting with Hammond yet. I guess everyone's afraid I'll be all healed up soon and in their hair. Nope, not gonna do it. I'll try to get out of here, but then I'm done. I have a chance and I'm not gonna let it go.

"Hi, Sir." Great, Doc's staring straight at me. "How do you feel?"

How do I feel? Do I really need to answer that?

"Like I slammed head first into the Iris."

"Close. You were shot by Jaffa and then blacked out as we made it through the Gate. If you hadn't landed on me, you would be here now," Sam jumped in to explain. I quickly interrupted her.

"So you're the reason I'm stuck in this bed?" I can't help but smile.

"Well, Sir, I meant you'd be dead, Sir," she stammered. Obviously, she's too worried about me to see the expression on my face.

"Sam, calm down. I know what you meant, I was just joking." I laid by head back and closed my eyes.

"Jack, you okay?" Daniel's a little annoying at the moment. I waved my hand a little, just to let him know I'd heard.

"Can I talk to Sam, alone, for a minute?" I opened my eyes and quickly glanced at the group surrounding my bed.

"If you start getting tired, let yourself fall asleep!" Janet ordered. I waved her off and turned to Sam.

"Okay, I heard you 'n' Napoleon talking about the future of my career, so I know all about my knee, but what's with all the 'Gener' crap?" She was there when the Doc said it. Unless she'd known already, she would have asked about it.

She gave me a shy smile and sat on the edge of my bed. "While we were off world, your promotion finally came through. I wanted to tell you while we were in that alternate universe, but I'd been ordered to keep quiet. You are now officially Brigadier General Jonathan O'Neill. The ceremony won't be held until you're feeling better." She grabbed my hand and smiled, just a little, just for me. Unfortunately, she didn't know that her promotion had come in the day before we'd gone off world. Now's the best chance to tell her.

"Well, _Lieutenant Colonel_ Samantha Carter, I'm glad I'm finally in the loop." I grinned at the shock on her face. For once, she was speechless.

"I know I have two options in my current condition, and I don't like either of them, but I am willing to accept one of them."

She looked at me, concerned for my mental stability I can tell. It was her "oh great, Jack's gone nuts" look.

"According to Janet, your only option is to retire." I could see the sadness in her eyes, and knew she was thinking of everything the Doc had told her.

I don't want to retire, or be discharged. Hell, I know more about this entire base than anybody but Hammond. I'm still useful. Who'll Thor beam up at his every whim if I'm not here?

"Yeah, well, you know we never agree on anything." Good, that made her smile. "Sam, you're my best friend. I'll be fine as long as all of you are here to help me."

**Part II**

WHAT? Colonel – I mean, General O'Neill was actually asking for our _help_? We brought the wrong one back. That's all there is to it. Usually he yells, throws things, refuses to eat. Now he's smiling, and laughing, and… asking for help?

I don't know what's going on, but I'm not sure I like it. It almost seems like he's giving up. If he works hard for this, and is still discharged, at least he tried. If he's just discharged, well, I don't know. This man just isn't _my_ Jack. If he's _crippled_ because he doesn't try, he's not the same person I fell in love with.

"Well, Sir, I have some things I need to take care of, so I'll just let you sleep."

_A/N: Okay, i know it's short and i'm sorry, i'm trying to get these out as soon as i can, but i've decided to fix a lot of them, because this originally was sooooo totally messed up i have no clue what i even wrote. i think this was one of those chapters i wrote while watching my brothers while they played outside, making sure they didn't kill each other or themselves while playing in our driveway._

_tell me what you think, please i'd really love to know, i hope y'all like it, i'm not sure i really do.  
_


	15. So, Just to Get This Straight

_A/N: okay here's the latest!_

**So, Just to Get This Straight...  
**

**Part I**

AAAHHHHHG! Six months and I'm _still_ in this Damn chair! Why the _HELL_ can't I do this? I've never had this problem before. I've been doing everything they tell me to, but we just can't get this knee to move, much less put any weight on it. It hurts all the time, but hell if I'm going to let them see that.

"General, how are you doing today?" the Doc had the audacity to ask me. I was sitting in the frickin' infirmary waiting for my weekly check up.

"Just fine, Dr. Fraiser." I smiled at her. She'd stopped showing any sign of shock about four and a half months ago. Unfortunately, my knew attitude still hasn't stopped her from poking and prodding me with the biggest harpoons she could find.

She picked up one of those weapons to take blood and I put my hand gently over the fingers holding the needle. I'd been poked, jabbed, and glared at by every member of the SGC medical staff since I'd woken up.

"Janet, what's going on?" I looked straight into her eyes, hoping to portray some form of understanding to her.

She didn't answer, just continued running her tests.

"Fine. Maybe you can answer me another question. Why's Carter avoiding me?"

"_Lt. Colonel_ Carter has been very busy lately, _Sir­_!" Boy, she's snappy today, and very professional. That means it's some personal reason.

Can nobody around here give me a straight answer!

**Part II**

God, my lab is boring. Never thought I'd hear myself say _that_. There's just nothing left in it for me. I can't concentrate long enough to work on anything, but my required projects.

Oh, thank God, Daniel's here. I am _so_ ready for an interruption.

"Sam, we're going down to see Jack, you wanna come?" he asked, leaning on my desk. Oh, great, it's about _him._

"No, that's okay. I have too much stuff to get done here," I answered. Pretty lame if you ask me.

"Stuff? Sam, have you gone to see him at all in the last six months?" Daniel stood and started pacing in front of me.

I shrugged dismissively.

"Janet said that by all accounts her initial assessment was wrong. He should be up and walking around by now. Okay, maybe hobbling around with crutches, but up and moving." He walked around the desk and approached me, laying his hand on my shoulder.

I threw down the tools in my hands and glared at him. "What has this got to do with _ME_!"

"It's got _EVERYTHING_ to do with you!" Wow, forceful Danny-boy. Wait, did I just say 'Danny-boy'? Crap.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What exactly do you meant by that?"

"What happened between you guys, Sam? We were a great team."

"Daniel, please-"

"No!" He actually interrupted me. He _never_ interrupts me. Little brother's on the rampage now. "I'm not leaving this lab until you tell me what's going on. Jack's smiling, which is just scary, but he looks for you every time we go to see him."

"You really want to know?" I asked. I sighed, realizing I was going to have to appease him.

He nodded, taking a seat on the stool next to me, and grabbed my hand.

"I didn't believe Janet when she said there was a possibility Jack could hear what we said. I told him, Daniel. Everything. He heard me, told me he loved me too."

Daniel laughed curtly, but stopped immediately when I shot daggers his way.

"I'm sorry Sam, but you're doing all this just because you both finally admitted to each other just what the rest of us have seen for years?"

"No, he's just so… so… so chipper. He doesn't fight Janet about anything. He smiles all the time, but his eyes are dead. He knows he's done here and without the military, he's dead. I don't want that shell."

"You ever stop to think that he smiles because he remembers the day you told him how you felt? Or that he's depressed because he hasn't seen you in six months?"

"He's seen me!" I protested loudly. He has! I mean, we've crossed paths, right?

"Yeah, but he hasn't seen you smile or heard you laugh."

I shrugged again.

"You're the reason he's stuck with the SGC for so long."

What? I know my face reflected my confusion, but I was too confused to even hide it. If Jack had really loved me, or even remotely liked me like _that_, wouldn't he have gotten me _out_ of his chain of command? Or at least talked to me about it?

"Jack would have retired after the Za'tarc thing, but the only person he ever wanted to relinquish his command to after that first year was you." Daniel knew about the testing? "He knew if he retired too soon, you would end up under the command of some schmuck. He kept trying to push through your promotion so you could take over SG-1. He didn't want you to have any other team because he knows you love gathering the new information first."

I sat back at Daniel's explanation. Jack had been thinking this moment through for years. I shuddered. I had been so selfish, never wanting to be the one to leave the SGC. But I also know that Jack would go stir crazy with out the front line action.

"Go talk to him, Sam. The rest of us can wait."

**Part III**

Okay, now she's just being a bully. She took the Damn chair away. Dr. Napoleon put a brace on my knee and gave me crutches. She told me I was going to learn to walk again with in three months, or she wouldn't even clear me to fly a desk.

Sometimes, I hate that woman.

So now all I can do is paperwork and sleep. I've already finished both for the day. Might as well spend my time trying to find ways to get around the base. I could always get the Airmen to bring me whatever I needed, but that would really piss off the Doc, and I _know_ she's got larger needles hiding somewhere for me.

Okay, so now I'm freakin' hungry. I'm going to have to attempt the long trek to the commissary. Jell-O, that's what I need, a nice, _big_ bowl of Jell-O.

I grabbed the crutches and slowly made my way to the door. I never expected the other side to hold such a wonderful surprise for me.

"Carter?" I started to fall backwards. Thankfully my chair was facing the door.

"General, are you okay?" She rushed over to my side and helped me settle a little more comfortably.

"Sir, Daniel said you weren't up and moving yet."

"Eh, Doctor's orders. I guess she's getting sick of me." I smiled at her and noticed as she looked away quickly.

"So, what brings you to my humble… office?" I joked.

"Um, Sir, I think we need to talk." She was all business and I knew she was dead serious.

I straightened up and looked into her eyes. I have a feeling I know what this is about, but with Sam, you can never be too sure.

"Topside, let's go." I used my crutches to help me stand.

"But, Sir, what about-"

"I can make it. Don't you worry about me, I'm a big boy." I allowed her to open the doors and push buttons for me, knowing it would be more embarrassing trying to do it myself.

We reached the top and headed towards our boulder. It was a little spot about a normal ten minute hike up the mountain, still within the borders of the complex, but nowhere near the paths the SF's take. Today, though, it took us nearly twice as long to reach it.

Exhausted, I flopped down on the ground. It was hard climbing up that mountain without being able to use both legs.

"Sit… down… Colonel," I breathed between gasps.

"Here," she told me holding out her hand. "I grabbed some of your painkillers on the way out."

I took them gratefully and swallowed them dry. Nasty, but it worked. I grinned as she made a face.

"So," I said, figuring if I didn't jump right in we could be dancing around the problem all afternoon. "What brought you to my office?"

"I think we need to talk, Sir." She was fidgeting from foot to foot.

"Sit. Down. Colonel," I repeated my earlier request.

"Yessir." She sat next to me on the ground and pulled her knees up to her chest. "Permission to speak freely, Sir?"

"Granted. Now, Sam, there's something I'd like to tell you." I made sure I was facing her, this was not something I could tell her without making eye contact.

"I wanted you to be the first to know my official decision. And before you get all huffity, you should know I made my decision as soon as I found out you'd made it to Lt. Col. Sam, I'm going to retire-"

"But, Jack, Sir-"

She cut me off? Doesn't she know me by now? I could see the frustration lining her face. I told her the truth, I did want her to be the first to know. I wanted to talk over my options, _our_ options with her, but I had been forced to let General Hammond know first. I already put my letter in.

"If you'd let me finish!" She looked down, blushing. She looked amazing when she blushed. The flush of her cheeks accented her cheekbones. It was then that I'd realized just how hard she'd been pushing herself these past few months.

"My God, Sam!" I whispered. I brushed my hand along her cheek and under her eye. It broke my heart. It wasn't her embarrassment that made her cheekbones stand out, it was the fact that there was almost nothing there to cover them. Here eyes were sunken deep into her head.

I wrapped my other arm around her waist, not caring how it bent my leg. I could easily reach right around her. I looked into her eyes, but my focus was drawn to the dark circles surrounding them.

"You're doing it again," I spoke gently into her ear.

She breathed in deeply and sighed, nodding in admission.

"Does the Doc know?"

Another nod.

"Does it have anything to do with me?"

She hesitated this time and I could tell she wanted to shake her head no, she even started to, but then she just sat silent and unmoving.

"Dammit. I knew there was a reason Cpt. Ahab was treating me like Moby Dick."

Success! That brought a grin and slight chuckle.

"Okay, well, I'm going to explain what I started to tell you earlier." I lifted her chin. "Could you please look at me?" She allowed her head to be lifted and I continued.

"There's no way I can ever fully retire from the SGC, I would just go crazy, but with my recent injuries it has been brought to my attention that the only way I can stay in the Air Force would be to become a Desk Jockey. That's just out of the question and Hammond's known that for years. They've been planning for this all along." I took a breath here, waiting to see if she had caught on yet. She hadn't.

This is so out of character for me.

"My Black Ops training gave me the equivalent of a Masters in strategy and tactics. We're going to use that to allow me to retire from the Air Force and become the new 'Civilian' Strategy and Tactics Advisor. The President has agreed and my clearance will be kept the same. The only difference is I'll most likely never step through the Gate again."

I could see the sadness in her eyes. I had just, in so many words, told her that our little family would be broken up.

I sat there, trying to read her, figure out what was going on in that huge brain of hers. Slowly, a small smile crept across her face and grew to a full on grin. I smiled back. It was the first real smile I'd gotten from her since I awoke.

"Sir, this is quite a lot to take in," she said. She was obviously stunned.

"It's Jack, I'm retired now. My letter was accepted the second we left the confines of the compound." I watched the color return to her face and her eyes brighten. I knew talking things over would help us, as much as I usually hated it.

**Part IV**

I sat, listening to all he had to say, stunned into silence. He retired? I mean, I knew he couldn't go on missions with us anymore, but he was leaving? No, wait eh wasn't leaving the SGC, just SG-1 and the Air Force.

I finally found my voice.

"Jack, I don't really know what to say. I think we should have that talk I was going for." I wanted to talk to him about his reaction in the AU, about him hearing everything I said, about what he said upon waking.

"Shoot."

Oh, man! He was going to make me start? What should I do? It was easy to talk to him when I thought he couldn't hear me. It's just hard to talk to him, knowing he already knows how I felt about him.

I must have sat there for a little too long for him, because he spoke up first.

"Okay then, I'm going to start. I already know how you feel, I guess. I mean if you really meant what you said, so I'm going to tell you everything I've been feeling from the time I thought I was never going to see you again until this point right now."

He pulled me closer, I could see the physical pain racing through his body. I helped him readjust his leg so the bones weren't pulling apart so much.

"Thanks." He winced. "When I realized I was in an Alternate Universe, I thought of how much I needed you there, for scientific reasons. But as I was listening to their story, and I discovered they knew nothing of the mirrors, all I could think of was never seeing you again. I thought of how lucky that other Jack was, and how I would never get to tell you how much I love you.

"I heard once that 'something is never as important to you until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life and death.' Pretending that I didn't love you all these years has been a sort of death for me.

"When I saw you, I had already decided I was going to show you how I felt. In a way, it almost tore me apart to have to come back and pretend nothing was there. I hated having to call you 'Major' and 'Carter.' You mean so much more to me than that."

He ran his fingers through my hair. I leaned into his touch, knowing for once I was allowed to.

"I wanted to hold you so close every time I heard you cry. Those two days you were gone were Hell. The day I woke up, my driving force was you. You told me how you felt that day, and I felt so helpless lying there. I wanted to tell you I felt the same, _still_ feel the same. If you don't anymore, that's okay, I guess. I just want you to know that I will always love you."

I felt the tears starting to sting my eyes, threatening to spill over. I could let them now, he was no longer my CO. The one day I'd been waiting for and all I could feel was guilt. Guilt over how I'd treated him for half a year, over how we had come to this point.

"Oh, Jack," I barely choked out. The tears were flowing freely now. "I do still feel the same. I was just so scared of… well, everything. I wasn't quite sure if you felt the same way, then you were so… chipper, all the time, but your eyes were so dull and lifeless." My head dropped slightly, staring at our hands, the fingers interlocking.

"I was so sad. I never got to see you. Maybe in passing, but that was it. It hurt so bad."

I could see him reliving all those lonely months, just like I was. We didn't need that anymore. We had each other and were finally allowed to.

"Jack, please come home with me." I blurted it out, but he didn't give me much of a chance to finish.

"Huh?" I could see the shock in his eyes. It forced a giggle out of me. "No giggling."

"Sorry. Jack, I know you can't drive yourself and you've only left the base for supplies. I figure you could stay with me." I shrugged. It's sorta my subtle way of showing him nothing could be more perfect.

He leaned in close, and I could smell his cologne and aftershave mixing in the wind. As his lips brushed mine I felt a small shudder run through both our bodies. I reached up to hold his face in my hands, but he pulled away.

"Sam, please," he said, hiding his face from my view.

"Does it hurt?" I asked him. I touched the underside of his chin and turned him towards me.

"NO, it's just, how can you stand to be with this horrible, ill-tempered, scarred old man?" I could see him getting nervous.

"I don't think you're old. Your attitude is a reflection of all the crap you've overcome in your life, and I don't care what you look like or that you're going to walk with a permanent limp. All that matters is I love you."

_A/N: So, here's the latest sorry it took so long. i know it's a little out of character, but i just dunno. i will put in what was in the envelopes in the epilogues coming up next! if you review tons i just might make it go faster. i know there's an inconsistency in this chapter, but now i can't find it, so if you see it, let me know. _

_ thank y'all.  
_


	16. Epilogues

_A/N: Okay, so here's the last part, i hope you enjoy it!_

**Epilogues**

**Part I **

Sam ran through the front door as fast as her body would allow.

"Jack! Jack, where are you?" she shouted. Not hearing an answer, she quickly panicked. Jack's Jeep was still in the driveway, so he couldn't have gone far. Yeah, it was still weird seeing that Jeep instead of the huge truck he used to have.

She headed upstairs, hoping she would find him napping somewhere on the upper floor. She couldn't' hear any sounds from the bathroom and checked the upper bedroom. No one was there.

Dammit! Where was he?

"Jack!" she screamed, flying down the stairs. She had checked every place in the house. The attic and basement door were still locked, from the outside.

Outside! That's it! It was a hot, clear summer day in Colorado Springs. Jack would be outside swimming in their pool.

"Jack! I've been looking everywhere for you!" She stood, hands on hips, on the back deck.

Jack spun around in the water, shocked, sending spray in all directions. He jiggled the raft in front of him as he turned, but ducked under the water when her heard her gasp. He popped up amid the sputterings, to a small voice speaking out.

"Mom! You made Dad knock me off the raft!" the small boy shouted accusingly at Sam. Jack was rushing out of the pool towards Sam with the boy in his arms, worry strewn across his face.

"Sam, what's wrong? Is the baby okay?" He ran up and threw a wet arm around her, and kissed her forehead softly.

"I'm sorry, Jake, I didn't meant to scare you both." She lifted her son out of Jack's arms and wrapped him in a towel. She set him in a chair in the warm sun to dry off. She turned to Jack, watching him towel off his sleek, scarred body. She approached him and ran a hand through his wet hair.

"So…?" Jack questioned. He was growing impatient, causing Sam to giggle.

"Sorry, Honey. My appointment with Janet went fine. While I was there, though, these came through the 'Gate." She pulled two white, professional envelopes out of the purse she had just recently started carrying. One was addressed to "Colonel Jonathon O'Neill", the other to "Major Samantha Carter."

"Sam, this hasn't been us in like five years." He placed them on the small wooden patio table Jack had built as his own wedding present to Sam.

"Do you want to open them first, or should I tell you whose IDC they were sent with?" Sam bubbled.

Jack laughed. They did that a lot lately, bubbling, laughing, giggling. It was something neither of them had any reason for five years earlier.

"How about you tell me as I'm opening it."

"Okay." Jack was ripping the seal open. "Well, there's a reason they're addressed the way they are." Jack started to pull the card out. "It was John's IDC."

Jack looked up at her, the card still in his hand. "John, as in J.J.?"

Sam nodded her head. "Go ahead, look at it already!"

He unfolded the card and quickly scanned it. The expression on his face was priceless. It sent Sam into another fit of giggles.

"What's so funny?" Jake asked from under his towel.

"Nothing, honey. Just relax."

Jack stood, still reading the card. "Is this for real?"

"Teal'c, General Hammond, Daniel and Janet all received invitations as well. We can stay in that universe as long as the ceremony takes and longer. Apparently, that bacteria their Jack brought back years ago alters the DNA somehow, which explains why it tried to kill John. But anyway, that's why we didn't suffer the effects of entropic cascade failure." Sam was pacing back and forth her hand over her protruding stomach, while she explained everything to Jack.

"Wow, John and Ta'ashra getting married? Wonder how Daniel feels about his daughter marrying an O'Neill?" Jack joked. He tossed the invite back on the table and sat in one of the chairs belonging to the set he'd made.

"O'Neills can't be that bad. Heck, I married one." Sam smiled and sat in Jack's lap, his wet trunks soaking through the back of her pants. "Now the only question is we get permission for Jake to go through the Gate?" she continued.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." Jack tucked a loose lock of hair behind her ear.

"And why not? I became close to them as well." Sam shot him a mocking glare.

"Sam, you'll be seven months, that's too close. And we don't even know if we'll be allowed to take Jake along." He rubbed her lower back, remembering how much it had helped during her pregnancy with Jacob.

"Let's make a deal. If Jake can't go, I'll stay here with him. If he can, but Janet won't clear me, I'll stay, no complaints. If she clears me, I'm going, okay?"

"Okay. I guess if Janet says it's okay, I won't argue." He pulled her down close to him and kissed her, a smile playing softly against their lips. "Besides, we got pregnant with Jake while I was still on active duty."

The couple headed inside with their son, ready to dry off and get dinner started. They walked right by the mantle that held a framed photograph and two framed letters, written by General Jack O'Neill and Dr. Samantha O'Neill, reminders of their time in another world, where they had the chance to see what they could be together.

* * *

"John, Tay, congratulations," Jack said, shaking John's hand and laying a kiss on Ta'ashra's cheek. 

"Thanks for coming, Uncle John," John replied smiling brightly. Jack nodded back to him.

"And who's this little guy?" Ta'ashra asked Sam.

"This is our son, Jacob." She leaned down to face Jake. "What do you say?"

Jake stepped forward and clasped Tay's hand in his own. "Congratulations." He leaned in and kissed the back of her hand. He crisply then stood back and cleanly saluted both Ta'ashra and John.

The group broke into laughter as John and Ta'ashra saluted in return.

"So, how'd you guys decide it was finally time you two got together?" John asked with a goofy grin that reminded Sam so much of Jack.

"He was injured on the way back after we met you. He's been out since," Sam laughed back.

**Part II**

"Jack, why are you fidgeting so much?" Sam scolded her husband as she was helping him into his suit. "This isn't our first child to be married."

"True, but she _is_ my only daughter and she's marrying a Fly Boy, for cryin' out loud." Jack gave a half scowl.

"In all fairness, you _did_ give him permission," she straightened his tie and led him to the foyer.

Tom was already at the front of the church, waiting. Sam and Tom's mother had already been led to their seats when the wedding party realized that Jack had stopped in his tracks.

"Wow, Channy, you look… beautiful," Jack choked out.

"Thank you, Daddy."

Jack took her by the arm and kissed her cheek. "You ready for this?" he asked, smiling.

She nodded.

"Okay, here we go. I love you, Sweetheart."

"I love you, too, Dad."

**Part III**

Jake, Dan, Chantal's husband Tom, and Ryan stood at attention in front of the caskets of the Generals O'Neill. The rain poured down as the service ended.

They each returned to their respective families to head to the house Jack and Sam O'Neill had called home for over 35 years.

"Dad?" Jake's oldest, Ema, looked up at him, her big brown eyes staring right into his soul.

"Yes, Dear?"

"How did Gramma and Gramps die?"

Jake picked her up, careful not to let her muddy shoes wipe off on his dress uniform.

"The doctor said they both were just too old and had gone through too much. But they were happy, and died in each other's arms. In the end that's what matters most. And you know what?" he said smiling at her.

"What?"

"When you're old enough, I'll tell you all about them."

_A/N: So that's the end! tell me what y'all think! i had a lot of fun reading what you thought about all the different chapters i hope you liked the way i chose to end it. i didn't want to just give them their time together and then not know anything that had happened later on, so that's why i did it the way i did. now hopefully i can start working on my other stories, i also may have a laptop to use soon, so yeah thank you all again! if you want more to it, maybe i can write more in-between epilogue thingy's just let me know!  
_


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